Zaxlog

Mood: maybe its because im a londoner........
Listening to: workmates interesting "london" accent

I might just let John tell this part of the story, seeing as I was driving around with Julia at the time, trying to avoid the silvery mist of certain death that is the Beast of Drof-D'ar.  So, take it away John:

Well it was a dark and moonless night when Tony and I were dropped outside the Museum with mischief on our minds. (editorial note - It was the middle of the day, please excuse John and his tendency to over dramatise events) We crept up to the silent and apparently deserted building, all the lights were off and there was a chill wind blowing from the east.  Looking through the front door we could see that the museum was actually still open, perhaps there was some kind of evening function, or party occuring. (over dramatising? more like delusional! - ed) I brazened up to the guard, an elderly gentleman with a white bushy moustache who welcomed me with outstretched hand and a smile.  Was he attempting to put me off my guard? Was he secretly a highly trained hassasin, attempting to befuddle my mind with his cunning disguise and fiendishly false friendliness?  Was his open palm with it's wrinkles and liver spots really a weapon that could be used to kill or maim as the owner saw fit or perhaps it was laced with a delicate poison that would be harmless to the trined hassasin who had spent the formative years of his life building up a resistance to it, but deadly to any others that came into contact?  I considered these and other options for a moment before reaching out and skaking the mans hand.  "Welcome to the museum of Natural History, please feel free to look around, photographing is allowed but please don't take photographs of the staff." With those words of warning echoing in my ears (I had always suffered something terrible from tinnitus), Tony and I strode purposefully towards the first exhibition hall. Held within were magical wonders far and above anything that I had expected from such a small and tawdry museum. There was an ancient ephebian coruscle tusk, used in the 1st century for collecting the falling berries from the Krattratory tree. They were thought to give the person who drank the berry juice from the tusk the libido of an african rhino.  Other fabulous items included the first ever hydraulic umbrella built by one T.L. Erumbaum of Massachusets.  It worked fantastically as a weather proofer but unfortunatelt was a bit on the heavy side for day to day use.  Moving swiftly (you call that swiftly? - ed) through that exhibition to the next hall, I was greeted by the most awe inspiring and wonderful sight ever.

More from Johns awe upon the morrow.