http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing That's the world from my perspective - with a free weblog from blogigo. en wishing wishing Sat, 05 Aug 2006 04:30:21 +0200 daily 1 Today has been an awful day. It's supposed to be one of the better days too, my birthday. Instead of people that I love being concerned about me, for just one day, theyre more concerned with my brother. that shouldnt shock me, as its been that way for 2 years since he moved. im constantly being told that im the one that needs to get over things and let go of things, yet they sit and talk the same trash i talk. it makes no sense to me at all. ive come to realize that people talk a big game and say theyre never gonna do this or never gonna do that, and they end up doing it. its just so fucking frustrating that for today, i wanted to be the main attention. just today. im 26 years old and im upset because im not getting attention. a psychologist would say theres a billion reasons why and a billion reasons wrong with me, but i dont care. on my birthday im sitting here crying my eyes out. my mother took me out tonight. she took me to dinner and a movie. 50% of her time was spent on the cell phone making sure my... Sat, 05 Aug 2006 04:30:21 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing/sympathetic-empathetic-apathetic-just-pathetic/4/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing/sympathetic-empathetic-apathetic-just-pathetic/4/ In response to the comment, the trip has been planned since April. Life happens and theres nothing you can do about it. Blown tires, moving, etc. I've tried to get public assistance - I don't qualify. I've been to two charities - I don't qualify for some things. I have no children and the money I do get is well over the limit that they can provide for legally via their grants. You kinda sounded like my mom in that comment. Why would you do this? Why would you do that? That is very irresponsible! I mean no harm to your feelings, just stating the way I feel. This is why I was leary about blogging. C'est la vie, right? I should also mention that the lack of funding in my account is due to an error in the financial aid/brusar office at my school. I've spent 3 weeks or so clearing it all up. I should say that when I wrote the first entry, things were really bad for me mentally. Im not writing to ask for feedback, nor am I writing to ask for sympathy. I just need a place for peace. That's why I made this... Tue, 04 Jul 2006 23:48:22 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing/This-has-been-a-revolution-of-the-mind./3/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing/This-has-been-a-revolution-of-the-mind./3/ Well, Im going to make this quick as it is 3am and Im ready for bed. My man's parents are unsuspecting angels. Out of the blue, they called us today and asked us to come have dinner with them. That was the first time we had eaten today. We had a huge meal. That's the only time I've eaten today. His father handed us a ten dollar bill. That was his last ten dollar bill, too. He has to go to the bank tomorrow to get money out for him to have spending money for the holiday. The atm's are open. They also sent some food home with us. Im thankful for them. My family still doesnt know anything about my finances. I don't let them inside that part of my world. I know it's sad, but I can't. Im sick of it being thrown up in my face. I'm barely letting them inside my world at all, to be honest. I've just been hurt too bad by my own family. My support, the first person I run to, the only person I really lean on, and the one who makes it all better for me is my man. Im thankful for him. Tue, 04 Jul 2006 03:19:03 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing/Unsuspecting-Angels/2/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing/Unsuspecting-Angels/2/ I guess this would be the place to put these thoughts down. You know the kind. The ones that keep you awake at night and just keep your mind racing. I guess the biggest thought on my mind right now is money. Im a college student who is living off of student loans and financial aid. If I work, I wont make enough to support myself and my financial aid will lower. I dont qualify for any public assistance, as Im not married and have no children. Things are just kinda blah for me right now. Yeah, I could ask family for help, considering I've been living off of ramen noodles and macaroni and cheese for a week now. I kid you not. Im out of milk, eggs, cheese, bread, cereal, butter. I have tea, ramen noodles, macaroni and cheese and a jar of peanut butter. I would've gotten my money [four thousand dollars] on june 22nd, but my school messed up. Now, I will be getting half either Monday or Wednesday [being that Tuesday is a holiday here in the united states]. The woman from the brusar [the financial place that... Mon, 03 Jul 2006 02:29:17 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing/C-est-la-vie/1/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/wishing/C-est-la-vie/1/