The Wellyboots Tribe Step Forth - again!!

May 16, 2005 at 22:30 o\clock

Feeling seriously down about school!

by: pcjjap

Maybe it's just a phase and I'll pass through it, but presently I am feeling seriously fed up with teaching my boys - and I think they are equally fed up with me!! I feel like I'm flogging a dead horse and not much is going in.  I can see that they are making progress (well some) in Maths and English, but any other subject - the 'fun stuff' is nothing but a grind to all of us. I rack my brains and spend many hours searching out new and inventive ways of presenting material and trying to make it all a bit more 'hands-on', but as soon as more than the most miniscule amount of brainwork is required I get tantrums and fooling around to the point where we all loose it with one another! Today I asked the boys to do a small amount of reading (four little one-paragraph job descriptions of egyptian jobs) while I went to photocopy a worksheet, but they could not even do that together without hitting each other and pulling hair - they fought over which way to read the page, left- right, left- right, or top-bottom, top-bottom!  Then the simple little worksheet was set for them to work on together. It should have taken them no time at all - with a little imagination and thought - but it took them over an hour + fooling time and they ended up missing swimming lessons again (another £14 down the plug) because even when we told them to stop (worksheet still unfinished) they couldn't get their shoes and jumpers on quick enough to get there in time.

I know this is moan, moan, moan, but that's what a blog is for is it not?...!

I really am not for the 'unschooling' approach as I couldn't cope with the disjointedness and actually don't think my boys would be capable of choosing what to do next. Their interests lie in football, skateboards and fooling around - and I'd struggle to find a way to make those very educational! There are constant 'carrots' being dangled as incentives (like "we can play a game together if you get your work done well today" - Jacob especially loves games), but none seem to be inviting enough, or the removal of them deterent enough to motivate him, or his brother, to get on and work.  I do not wish to have to hover over shoulders for the entire day, constantly  nagging them to 'get on'  - that is no fun for anyone.

Jacob did end up at the punishment desk three times today and he did get his work done better there, (seems he simply cannot work in the presence of any form of distraction at all - visual or audible - minimise them and it helps some), but the Egypt project I really want them to work on together, so I couldn't use it for that. Both boys ended up being given 'lines' (before tea) once they'd eventually finished  - "We will work sensibly together" - it was the most immediate & detestable punishment I could think of!

Do I just give up on joint projects, which would seem to be such a shame when to my mind there is so much benefit in them covering stuff together? Plus it would be incredibly difficult to teach them both everything separetly - not enought time in the year and we all need a life outside of school too!! As it is we really haven't covered all I wanted to this year - and I see no means of doing so now either (not enough time left) - and mainly because everything takes so much longer than I plan for it to. We're pretty much up to date with Maths and English, but all other subjects are lagging behind somewhat. We have no way covered a year of Science or Geography, History, Art, or any of those other 'extension' subjects that I had hoped to do more of this year. We have done some, don't get me wrong, just not enough I fear. I'm sure the boys are learning, but perhaps not as broadly as they might as school - and I am sure that bredth of knowledge is almost more important than depth of knowledge at this age. I would like to sweep everything at a 'covering' level and re-approach things later in more depth, however I feel we're not even doing that well at the moment. I am seriosly on the verge of considering school for them both, but I can see lots of reasons why I don't want to go there really. I hate the thought of what Jacob especially might soak up there - he is not the most discerning of little boys! And am pretty convinced it would not help either boy's over-all attitude and behaviour much at all - it would simply be me 'passing the buck' of my responsibilities on to someone else - NOT a good motive I guess  But I am at the point where I am really not enjoying schooling at all. I can get myself as motivated as I like, and fire myself with all kinds of new approaches, but to pass on that motivation to my boys is a completely different matter.

It's not just school either, it's everything that seems like a slog at the moment - daily chores, co-operation with anyone else in the family... Everything is an up-hill struggle with both boys, but always with oldest more than youngest.

Anyway - they are in bed now - "sorry"s said on both sides (mine and theirs) - intentions & desires for tomorrow made clear - tears shed, etc... We'll see what tomorrow holds!

Moan over - and still no baby here. I do worry what effect all my high stress levels might have on the poor little one!  

Comments for this entry:

  1. janhmmnorg wrote at May 17, 2005 at 00:42 o\clock:I\'m quite sure they\'ve done tons more than they would have done at school. I know I often try to fit in far more than C\'s capable of taking on board. To be honest, at primary age, most of the \'gravy\' - the history, geography etc is somethign they can pick up later, but, as I was saying to C the other day, if she doesn\'t know how to behave reasonably, and doesn\'t have the foundations of Christian \'character\' then all the other clever stuff she may be able to do is worth very little. I know I\'ve let C\'s behaviour slip over the past couple of months because I\'ve been so grumpy and tired I\'ve not been able to trust myself to respond proportionately to her, but now I\'m feeling prety much back to normal I can deal with it, and we\'re starting to see improvements.
  2. pcjjap wrote at May 17, 2005 at 00:56 o\clock:I absolutly agree with you :) Thing is I am simply no great role-model atm! I too easily fly off the handle :( Also, because Jake is now at the end of would-be Yr3 I do feel I need to cover some of the \'gravy\' (cool term) and it\'s seems silly to not have Joel join in on that too - albeit at a simpler level - and I do actually give him easier tasks MOST of the time. When they are doing something together I try to make it a task that they can both manage without too much difficulty. I feel that all the \'fun\' has gone out of school atm - despite me trying to inject it with plenty. The boys don\'t even have any suggestions how I can make it better - I have asked them - and they certainly don\'t want whole days of \'workbook\' work - which for me seems like a very attractive option atm - less effort, more concrete..., but oh so much more boring!! If I can just make them see what the alternatives are they might be a little more grateful (ho-humm)... Anyway - tomorrow\'s another day! :)
  3. ameelli wrote at May 18, 2005 at 11:39 o\clock:Ok Caroline- I know you don\'t want to hear this but maybe your approach to school at home just isn\'t what you all need right now. Do they have to be doping\'educational\' stuff ALL the time? PLaying football together can bring about so much it isn\'t just about playing. I really don\'t wnat you to feel like I am having a go at you and I understand how important it is for you to do school at home but I think you are being given the signs to take things a little easier. You are about to have a baby any minute, you already have a house full, you\'re limited on space, your dh is out often and you are suffering conflict, upset and disallusionment.

    The most important thing in your life is your relationship with your boys. Firstly you are their mummy. Teaching them is just another addition to that. You are not their teacher ( took me a LONG time to learn that one!). They need to see you as mummy and respect you for that. I very much doubt they will see your goals in the same way as you do - they are too young.

    I doubt vey much if I have said what I want to say in the way that I want to say it so please don\'t take any offence :-)
  4. pcjjap wrote at May 18, 2005 at 13:31 o\clock:Don\'t worry - I\'m not easily offended!! :) I do often thing about \'how\' we do school and what fits best for all of us. But I will pick up on a couple of your points - on my blog main! :)


Log in to comment:

Attention: many blogigo features are only available to registered users. Register now without any obligations and get your free weblog!