http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh just me en younameit younameit Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:22:33 +0200 daily 1 I'm leaving to Budapest today. I think it'll be my one last vacation until next april. woop woop I'll be free until then. hmm I'll be back on 4 Sept and that's when the real hard work begins! Wed, 13 Aug 2008 09:22:33 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/I-m-leaving-to-Budapest-today/80/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/I-m-leaving-to-Budapest-today/80/ Haven't been here for so long. There are so much that I don't want to forget however feeling the need to get away from. Summer vacation has started. Ive been spending time with my parents. Well, I chose to do that. I'm fed up with people. My experience, my past have altered me a bit. Whatever you say, call me an anti-social....ehehee I feel most comfortable safest and happiest with my parents. Are gifted kids destined to be loners? I say, we choose to be them. It's good fun to play with friends and of course, it feels good to have someone to care about you or to care about someone else. However, at the same time, I dont feel much connected with them, we do !!......jeez my baby cousins callin me again....ill update once again before i leave for my budapest trip x Sun, 03 Aug 2008 17:16:45 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/You-name-it/79/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/You-name-it/79/ David! I didnt receive any message from you, and otherwise, you shouldve called me! You coward! And you said you like me and miss me? hah. 'work is my priority and i have to sacrifice my private life' HOWS THAT?   you crazy shite. I dont know what to say. Tue, 08 Jul 2008 18:19:02 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/God/78/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/God/78/ I've got concert tonight, with the Pittsburgh Youth Symphony Orchestra. Been busy practising and doing sports. I'm going to resume my revision next sunday. The preparation for CE should be progressive... Other than that, I'm happy to receive my exam result. Honestly, I feel I'd be more successful if I were to continue to devote myself into academe. Geez. I so wanna improve my English this summer!!!! And I haven't started preparing my trip to Budapest. I'm too lazy :p xx   The look of love Is in your eyes The look your smile cant disguise The look of love Is saying so much more Than just words could ever say And what my heart has heard Well it takes my breath away   I'm missing someone whom I don't expect to miss. awww But it's of zero chance anyways...I'm just an old USED stuffed toy. Oh Dominic Fan!You're so good to be true...hmm Sun, 29 Jun 2008 06:32:00 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/29June2008/77/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/29June2008/77/ Over the past few weeks, I burried myself with tremendous amonunt of paperwork for my final exam.Now that I have a 9-day vacation, I decided to stuff it up with lots of workouts and serious practices. This is how I'm going to spend it on. Also, I'm going to start planning for my trip to Budapest.   David hurts me, a lot. I afraid I still haven't got over it, I'm still living in the shadow deep in my heart. I'm not sure how long it's going to take for me to walk out the shadow, or perhaps, I simply won't?   Why do you do that to me? You don't even do as you promised.Why did you start up everything and disappear suddenly? My life's been a roller coaster. There were so many things happened, my family and all those people I encountered in various activities. They made me lost faith in people. They transformed me into a person of steel but with a vulnerable heart inside.   I told you I couldn't afford to be hurt like... Sun, 22 Jun 2008 13:37:22 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/One-step-close-to-Summer/76/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/One-step-close-to-Summer/76/ I try hard to pretend and enters into a state of conciousness where her shattered soul could rest on;where she could hide and let time to rot away the wound. Thu, 05 Jun 2008 17:26:04 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/05June08/75/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/05June08/75/ Great. Finally comes to June and in weeks time, I'll be  free from school!!!  Now that I've been busy in preparing for the surge of exams at school. I said I would go back to top. Surely, later on Ill start gearing up for my trip to Hungary! YAY! However, I'd better prepare for the battle  at school first, for the sake of my parents. I need to secure them since they've devoted so much to me, all that love and resources contributed in my extra-curricular activities. Although they don't have a high profile, they are the wise.  Apart from music and school, I'm rocking in sports really. Hopefully next year, I could start my triathlon training since I'm so busy at the moment!    I do not work hard for the present, but for the rest of my life.   Speaking of which, I can't believe David is like that..aw so BAD! :( Perhap, the secret of life is to appreciate the pleasure of being terribly, terribly deceived. Then you'll... Mon, 02 Jun 2008 10:08:14 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/been-while-since-last-updated-the-blog-heh/74/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/been-while-since-last-updated-the-blog-heh/74/ Ive been tres revising, practising and exercising. Its really the crucial time to gear up towards my future. Now I'm working for my later life, not the present moment. Being busy makes me happy but I an't happy to be busy with every single thing. After all these, as my soul has gone shattered, I found my shelter in such hectic life. Pathetic? I don't know. It does nothing bad for me though. My hardwork will surely pay off, unlike my devotion of love to someone. I can ensure a better future, I can have a leaner body shape and I can play better music too. It's a temporary getaway but time is doing her own job. It's healing my wounds. However, the impact of my early life and my recent love life is never to be softened.     Sun, 25 May 2008 12:40:41 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/25May08/73/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/25May08/73/ Now I know what's exactly benneath him. Finally, I can let go of David. I'm not regret at it. I knew what I was doing. Who can control love. awww What pathetic hopeless romantique heh! He said he missed me all the time but obviously this is not what it's like, since, we haven't met since his departure for the trip. It's somewhat disappointing to say the least.Then, it's the end.   It's the end of a romance, not exactly a relationship.   Sometimes, things just happen in a wrong time. If you and I were born in another place and time, things could be different. Oooh, so tres charmant my dear.   Fri, 16 May 2008 16:40:56 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/Thank-god-it-s-friday/72/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/Thank-god-it-s-friday/72/ I continue to practise hard. I continue to work hard. I'm not doing these for the present, but my future only. For a person like me, should deserve more choices. I dont want to waste myself since I've wasted few years of my youth already. hm I didn't violate it but I just didn't live my life to the fullest. That's not what I wanted. Life is short, and for my life, I want it to be something. Well, for myself, at least. Funny! My parents said Dominic definitely had interests on me because he gave all his attention on me during the classes. Nah, it's probably because I'm the youngest in the class but one of the most outstanding one there. I heard he's a gay but anyways, it's so none of my business.Though, honestly, he's like Sebastian, totally my cup of tea. heh. But oh gawwd, I don't want another David. Well, here, speaking of David. My feeling towards him has been subsiding ever since his worldwide trip. The feeling has gone sour and bitter. Oh... Wed, 14 May 2008 12:26:00 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/14May08-sigh/71/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/14May08-sigh/71/ its your day off today.  and you chose to spend it with your work you said you would call me in 5 mins. but then ..not even in 5 hrs. now i understand the definition of complement. Sun, 11 May 2008 09:13:00 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/you-only-take-me-as-your-stuffed-toy/70/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/you-only-take-me-as-your-stuffed-toy/70/ Im working the best i can to meet my targets in music and academe. I know these are no hard work for a so call gifted but yh... Its gd to keep myself busy. Otherwise, I might end up burrying myself in my memories, my family..and yes, david. I had lesson with Sebastian yesterday..We remain close friends though there were some awkward moments heh. Well, Bei is lucky to have you.Seba, remember our time and I wish you love and everything you dream of in the future. :( My new teacher is going to be a french. hm Maybe my flute lessons will become more serious and substantial...Im goin to hungary this summer for sure, now I wait for Prof Dittrich's call, I guess he'll talk abt the my potential Austria trip?! ..  Good, everything is going on well,exceptI cant believe Im still hoping you'll find me. Pathetic. Is my hope for you subsiding bit by bit? Why don't you hold me,tight, like a fermata?Or is it that you want me to leave the game and, so, to avoid yourself getting hurt... Thu, 08 May 2008 13:19:47 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/tmr-is-friday/69/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/tmr-is-friday/69/ i realize i cant segregate myself from music. im back on playing the flute. heh. n now i feel so good. music is in my blood, its sewed deep inside my heart ever since i was 14.. my trip to study in hungary is becoming true and perhaps for austria, too. life is full of surprises.     now i wish i could have one last surprise from david..sigh Mon, 05 May 2008 16:25:44 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/music-enough-for-lifetime-but-lifetime-never-enough/68/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/music-enough-for-lifetime-but-lifetime-never-enough/68/ It started off so well They said we made a perfect pair I clothed myself in your glory and your love How I loved you How I cried... The years of care and loyalty Were nothing but a sham it seems The years belie we lived a lie I love you till I die Save me save me save me I can't face this life alone Save me save me save me... I'm naked and I'm far from home The slate will soon be clean I'll erase the memories To start again with somebody new Was it all wasted All that love?... I hang my head and I advertise A soul for sale or rent I have no heart I'm cold inside I have no real intent Save me save me save me I can't face this life alone Save me save me save me... I'm naked and I'm far from home Each night I cry I still believe the lie I love you till I die Save me save me save me Don't let me face my life alone Save me save me ooh... I'm naked and I'm far from home Sun, 04 May 2008 12:01:55 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/save-me/67/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/save-me/67/ not much to say abt scl, everythings goin on well. n well yeah, im likely to give up on becoming a musician. but i will work on my diploma.     u left n bk, its been almost 5 weeks. there hasnt been any proper conversation. only an email tellin me ur number...i was sad and disappointed at first. i felt like a stuffed toy. slowly, i managed to live with it. i knew i couldnt force u to do anything,which is, otherwise, meaningless. i would prefer to regard ur silence n nigilence as an act of cowardice.It hurts. How could u be like that? its cruel its blunt and its devastating. People said weve broken up frm the fact that our contact has been cut off in this month-time. my heart aches,soars and it breaks. something inside has died and i cant hide it or just cant fake it. oh dear, wh were u so serious n started everything in the beginnin? and suddenly deserted me like that. finally we had our first proper conversation last night. 'i... Sat, 03 May 2008 11:34:00 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/right-i-forget-u-want-me-to-be-ur-complement-only/66/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/right-i-forget-u-want-me-to-be-ur-complement-only/66/ for school, there r  5 weeks until my final exam. and yet, i managed to catch up with everything and hopefully by 1 week before the exam begins, i cn start doin some past paper.seriously, i need to reload myself, and tune to the combat mode. heh. no dying before the finish. gotta carry on until next march wooooot! i really want to improve my english. if i could have a proper eng tutor or perhaps for all, everythings gna be so much better. being the best here doesnt mean anything hoenstly since eng isnt the mother-tongue here and as donna said, this is just a small pond. think big. heh. for music, on my way to my LTCL diploma this nov. sebastian,.goin back to switzerland is for your own good. last year, u stayed for me but ud better go and finish ur music qualificataion. and i wish ur old witch girlfriend chokes and dies. if ure looking for a substitute of me, sorry theres no other me cuz im so unique. i wish you love and everything you dream of when ure back. we are unlikely to meet again since... Wed, 30 Apr 2008 18:53:42 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/great-no-scl-tmr/65/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/great-no-scl-tmr/65/ school- okay. going on as planned music- lost my technique completely... heh its goin to come back anyways sports-really fine. myself- time to go back to my 4-to-4-hrs eating plan. otherwise im becoming obesed heh. david...   Sun, 27 Apr 2008 04:24:56 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/days-until-the-start-summer-vacation/64/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/days-until-the-start-summer-vacation/64/ wednesdays are awful. the washing machine killed my ipod and hm, my laptop is haunted as it turns on and off itself for the sake of my public exam  next year, id better to warm up my rusty head in the cumin final exam in june. i think im likely to end up giving up being a musician, afteralll,everything started too late.BUT who knows. thank god for giving me such versatility.otherwise i wont have choices for my future... life is full of surprises. and  i must be sth. or i will have had wasted myself. hm . and shite! whyy the heck do i feel hungry all the time when im not working out as much as ive been lately?    i was dragged to the principals office today and asked to do an IQ test. for those people ive met today..honestly i dont care wt u are and who u are ..as they say if life is all a joke lets make it a good one.i try to live things in the fullest extent,well for those i really want to do. I have a big heart so i have a lot to give to those special... Wed, 23 Apr 2008 15:25:16 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/wednesday-my-ramblings/63/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/wednesday-my-ramblings/63/ music and schoolwork are going on well, as planned. im not doing sports as viscious as before since it takes time to practise the flute and study...i wud def pick up my workrate until after mid june!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! cnt wait!! for this summer, theres a high chance of me going to budapest and perhaps austria as well. now im waiting for prof dittrich's reply. hope it wouldnt be too expensive! david it was you who started everything.you said you liked me a lot and afraid to hurt me. then i told you i cant afford to be hurt and we agreed on age is not a problem.i know your family bkgd has made u into a person like this. i dont mind about the age, 20 years,just as long as we love each other you said you were not the type that would hold a gals hands on street. you said you were not that type who would text and give phone calls everyday and work is your priority and sex can wait. you said you wanted to go slow with me . i dont mind cuz i... Mon, 21 Apr 2008 12:56:00 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/was-it-all-worth-it/62/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/was-it-all-worth-it/62/ 'why dont you talk to meh?' at this moment, i cant care what you think of me anymore. its not the way to do things.....not sayin one word? what am i supposed to do ? god. ive been trying to convince myself ure just busy, and sadly, i still am. what hopeless foool. well obviously we are over...............................i just cant get over it. i told u......................whyy im shattered ill wait and see what happens until after ur jetlag is gone. damn it i miss you so much   Fri, 18 Apr 2008 11:32:00 +0200 http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/since-ure-back/60/ http://www.blogigo.co.uk/vivianhsieh/since-ure-back/60/