Mood: confuzzled :s
Listening to: hero of the day (live from s&m) - metallica
hmm things have got complicated and weird now! lol well saw tash last night and after signing up for 200 hours of community service for apsoloutly no reason except tash is in the mv and now its like weird! well she ignored me all night pretty much except so say hi and hug me! well she said it was because she wanted to let me have a night witht he lads which seemed fair and she says lets meet up today and she will make it up to me...so i cant go out to see emily today because peter latimer came over which was kinda a bummber but really good to see him coz now he is retired we never get to see him he is always going off somwherre different and meeting new people! well anyway for the evening i asked her if she was free and she said no so hmm and she also told me this weekend was off so i dunno whats going on! maybe what the rumours say are true and she is a slut wait no thats a lie gaz told me she is sometimes slutty but she is a good person so i trust him with my life so i beleive that but i just dunno wot i sgoing on i no i wanna be with her right now but long term i dunno if it could last i mean she spends loads of time in mv i think and i dont particularly like it in there coz plenty of weird people in there...like seriously weird and i feel extremely jaded so i duno. never felt jaded before in my life my cockly arrogance has always overcome it butnow its really weird and wow! lol this si what people mean by i'm too loud and outgoing...walking into mv was like a quiet person having a day out with me or somthing! well they signed me up for 200 hours and hmmm i will do it but i first said i would do it in the air cadets and no way am i gonna do that! will tell them that i will not be able to do it regularly due to school and so will find somthing else to do im sure oh well will be good for me to be around people i feel jaded by..i hope i dunno we'll see! anyway keep trying to see franccesca and she keeps either ignoring her phone or just cvutting me off...when i am lucky enough to get through to her its always maybe call me later about it in a few days so i do and she then ignores me! lol if im lucky...super lucky enough to get through twice then she will just say srry you shoulda told me bout it earlier...grrrr am tearing my hair out about that sometimes! well it pisses me off to the extreme she can be such a fecking skirt b!tch but i cant not like her! pisses me off but oh ell wot can u do about it! well hopefully will see tash more in the social situation i am comfortable with...just chilling in bmth.....mv is way too crazy and weird! lol but i got a pen! well anyway joining is more than anyone would do at bryanston! lol unless they were doing a guilt trip or somthing i dunno anyway just doesnt seem like somthing they would do! well thats a lie a few would but most would just not bother its true and the people im thinking of...most of them arent in my friendship group so if anyone has a fecking go at me i will go skitz! i wanna go back to skool a total chav for a day just to see peoples faces! then go back to my usual attire (t-shirt and jeans) meh tried a new look and damn does it suit me, black jeans, black t-shirt and black leather jacket!!! i looked smooth! well i certainly did get hot on the bike to bmth that day though! bought a wicked t-shirt taking the piss out of the song "young dumb and full of fun" they replaced fun with cum...not original but i like the song so now im buying loads of onmes insulting god and being slightly satanical coz its funny to insult god.....if he does exist he has done feck all for me! lol made the person i bought a wedding ring for leave me, made the people in my life hate me so i've given up caring anymore! well im off now coz im just in a towel and chav's are walking past in throngs checking me out...gonna get naked! lol joke im gonna go put some clothes on!
