diary of a lost soul

Nov 27, 2007 at 22:03 o\clock

am i getting back to my blog?

by: stebbo

wow its only been a day and im writing another entry! been a bit down for th last couple of days and its only getting worse, personally i blame not seeing lotty in a long time but there are other possible uni factors like work or friendship strains right now. it would be nice just to have a bit of time to myself but alas a house full of six people that will never happen im gonna go to bed soon its 9 oclock and i can ahrdly keep my eyes open after toby came back ratted at about 4 in the morning, i couldnt sleep anyway but he begins to blare his drum n bass. i dont really mind except the lack of sleep has probably made me grouchy. really dont wana have to tidy my room tomorow, did a full clean of the kitchen head to tail and i just cant handle doing my room, not tonight anyway, maybe tomorow it will be different! you never know lol it will be fun.

Nov 27, 2007 at 00:22 o\clock

a lot has changed since my last blog

by: stebbo

me and lotty are in a fully stable and happy relationship, the problem being i am at university in bristol...UWE to be exact and im doing ocmputer science, really hard work its been hard geting back into the working frame of mind after a year of bumming around. its weird to think i started this blog 3 years ago and it still feels like a bastion of peace for my mind. well anyway things are really different now, ive never really...properly had a gf where not seeing her was hard, with ali it was similar but not so extreme in feelings as with lotty, i dont wanna say shes the oneincase i jinx it but i am truly happy with her. the distance is such a strain though im past crying myself to sleep and i do jus sit up msot nights mising her unless im out on the piss, which is hardly ever now im skint as ive never been before in my life im scared about running out of food money, i know mum and dad could help me out but how can i expect to lerarn anything about money if i go to them wheni spend all my money on beer as one of my housemates says to me. so yeah that brings me onto my housemates, first of all theres alfie, hes a good bloke, total stoner but his hearts int her ight place, we dont really get along as close mates but theres no complaints about him he seems a decent bloke. the third guy in our house of 6 is toby, hes really cool again but me being me i tend to have problems getting along with guys who dont click with me from day 1 so were again not really close mates but there is definatley the same mutual respect as with alfie, that brings me on to the girls! ill start with sarah because she is the first that comes to mind...where to begin with sarah... she's essentially a good person and i coulod get on really well with her but she does seem to wrap her life in drama since she left her bf, she got with a guy called kyle who fucked her over royally and since thens he has been off with all these random guys fuck knows who half of them are but one time she let the guy she fucked take my seat on the taxi home...was really not impressed it made me so angry so it was me leo and kirsty trying to get home on our own when she said exploicitly she wanted to have a night out with me...fat chance. well anyway yeah she is essentially a really nice person she just needs to...emotionally mature and grow a bit of a thick sin, shes always reallyt sensitive about ebverything especially cleaning, whens hes in a strop she cleans which is cool but she always does it with a chip on her shoulder its like for fuck sake! if your gonna clean clean! if you dont wanna clean dont! anyway apart from that shes lovely and we get on really well eventhough i have reservations about her ability to keep the truth clear and not cloud it to make her seem better or worse off for sympathy. Then theres Hannah, same name as my sister and a totally bonkers girl! really loud and crazy and i love it! common knowledge is that alfie fancies the fuck out of her, he always asks about her if she isnt in and rightly so i say! shes a lovely girl! totally top bird! really down to earth and knows what she wants and does it! no complaints at all! the house is quiet and really placid without her. Finally there is Leo, the dreadlocked leo! shes lovely as well have a lot of not so deep but probably quite dep conversations with her about total crap when we both have better things to be doing like hwil emaking cups of tea we will thens pend a good 10 mins chatting lol! stoner too, but mostly on weekends which is cool! always happy to ofer a joint around so long as people dont take the piss! which it hink is perfectly fair! yeh my hosuemates ive been lucky with! love them all! my course mates are all a total laugh as well! the main ones i hang out with are trevor, met him on facebook before i went to uni and hes really clever! good at helping me with my work but im not using him for that hes an awesome mate and really fun to talk to! then theres chris! he is a bit of a joker but not he sort of joker people find annoying! always up for a laugh and is willing to admitt he might not be a genious but he does work hard and therefore gets results! then theres lottie...not lotty! as i kep spelling her name and probably will end up spelling it in this blog a lot! well shes... touchy... she is very obsessed with her bf who has started uni in swansea and is a virgin christian no sex before marriage person and gets very upset if you talk about sex around her in a ladish way like its not a big deal which is fair play to her...but shes on a course with lads and slips always happen and we joke about sex and she protests in her own small ways to make you feel uncomfortable but still shes awesome fun! doesnt drink much but will have the occasional alcopop or two! a really fun girl! finally there is andy! well what a character he is! has verbal diorrhea worse than me! which is really saying something lol he will do anything for his mates if needs be! there was a strong possibility he would become our mule with him having a car at uni, buthe is highly respected if not ridiculed for his inability to shutup or fix a computer problem without first clicking on about a million things probably making it worse before he sits down and logically thinks about the problem! much to the fury of our tutor julia! and anyone trying to help him to be honest! but hes the one i always invite to the pub purely because the only other close mate from my course on campus doesnt drink and the other two are off campus! but still hes a wicked drunk! really surprisingly ladish!  he also has a tendency to tell us the same "funny" stories about 100 times so we know his life really well quite quickly! lol but he is a decent bloke, no hang ups or insecurities, he is what he is, not surprising since hes a (ha!) mature student..well hes 24 so yeah that is my new life! my house is like a 70's council house in that its small, nothing but the basic amenities and everything else is falling apart! but its home and it does feel homey! thats HOMEY not HORNY incase you made the mistake i did just reading the last line after switching between applications! oh well lol! what else to add in? yeh im surprised how much i miss lottys mates, i mean i know without lotty most of them would not really have bothered to get to know me but they have all welcomed me so warmly its quite heart warming! except lottys house mate who goes through periods of putin gup with me and periods of blatantly hating me! although i think i do make her laugh sometimes with my lack of worldlyness! according to her anyway i reckon! but dont quote me on that one! so yeah this is my new life which will go on for 4 years! so this blog may doule in length before i enter the real world once again!