diary of a lost soul

Feb 7, 2007 at 16:19 o\clock

today suck

by: stebbo

today for the first time ever im angry at ali, in a proper way, i cannot handle seeing anyone today i want a day of being a hobbit and seeing noone coz she made me feel like shit this morning, she rang me and woke me up at midday after a night of having no sleep thanks, once again to me having far too much red bull on our night out because im just too lazy to change my drinking habbits to coke when i drive, and anyway with it being the same price, all drink 1.50 and red bull usually being more expensive its also a nice treat, anyway i digress, so im woken up and because i cant think straight and i cant remember what time im sup-posed to see her or if im supposed ot pick her up form work today she just has a go at me and really made me realise im a shithead. i can never remember anything i make plans and forget them in a few hours. i never used to be like this and after talking to ali im starting to think there is something wrong with me and that bloody diary i ordered off ebay to make bookings in to help me remember hasnt come so will prob just end up buying one in town today. I wish i was a betterperson and i wish i was good enough for ali. lifes just taken a massive turn downhill, no cash coz i spent it all on my new tattoo, i know a stupid idea but i really wanted it and i know im turning into a sort of lotty, buy what you want when you can character. I just wanna start a new life in a new placew, once again an old fantasy of mine i go through stages of having, dont aprticularly care anymore though because when i go to uni i will have my new life and my new everything so i will be able to pick and choose bits from my old life i wanna keep. now i just wish i never had to deal with people and could just live on my own and the only social contact i had with the outside was the delivery mandropping off all my ebay parcels! oh yeh and a food delivery guy, cant forget food. anyway i think i should go to get dressed now just out of the shower and its 3:19pm...oops