wow
the final rabbit is dead, were now down to just 2 goats, who i hink, as far as we can tell, are middle age and doing good which is happy news! more happy news is my car is squeaky clean inside and out although the tax disk has been lost by the garage so now it is not available to go on the road..ooops without risking a £1,000 pound fine, so for now its off the road. but yeh it appears vikki is reading my blog, maybe she has an rss feed to it..doubt it for 2 reasons, one everyone is lazy and hate rss, 2 does blogigo do rss feeds? anyway whatever first, you hate me because im competing with you for sympathy with my yeh dad wanted to die too at some points in his life...but look at him now he is happy and everything is fine so let go bout your mum tryna off herself 20 years ago, im sure she's past it, and now its because i made a joke out of her mum tryna kill herself. well thats my last point i guess really ive done my motions and ive kinda just com eout of it wanting to be social to each other for whatever reasons. anyway life trundles on, car is now squeaky and im really quite proud, got jake telling me how me thinks bout me everyday, not seen me for god knows how long and last time i saw him i was telling him i couldnt be with him coz of ali so i guess i havnt seen him in like 5 months. i dunno would i have gone out with him if he never left bournemouth well only god knows but just that feeling of abandonment i got from it, we both knew something was there but in a way im glad he didnt stay, since now he told me he has ditched exploding cow records but will open a recording studio?? he's got it sorted and i would have held him back in bournemouth? now ay things turned out good i think, hope he feels the same. yeh since the car was/is out of action i couldnt see ali today, which she took really badly since were in the middle of a bit of a drift apart anyway, its like, we both love each other so much with everything we have but i got short with her and she got short with me and were both really pissed off bout never seeing each other, and the car being busted is just another extension to our isolation from each other. yeah hope she hasnt got enough sponsorship money to jump out of thatplane yet because i really have a gut feeling she will die and that would be the end of me, i know its astupid but in my gut i jsut feel it and i wish i could support her, but she knows that im so scared of her doing it from when i stayed the night at hers and she was ill, well update on that actually on msn she has now told me the dates set for 26th for traiing and jump on 27th sadly i look to my contacts box for comfort and my eyes fall on the screenname die willingly, depressing as hell. plus afterwards she is doing another jump as her birthday present from someone, cant remember who i was in an emotional wreck of a state that night. anyway im gonna sign off now and find something useful to do with my days!
