diary of a lost soul

Mood: too much in love with people i shouldnt be....
Listening to: the hum of a computer

i hate to addmitt it but all my feeling about a few of..well one of them i nver oficially dated but i am at the stage where they are all coming out if they werent ever finalised in my mind if oyu know what i mean emily ellis is one of these....she gotta bf and i totally respect that andi dont intend on diong anything coz if i screw up other peoples lives as well i am in evem more trouble...also francesca arrggghhh i hate myself for saying it...she's single im single.. the only thing for it is for her to get a bf who isnt me....that should solve the problem like it did last time with andy..hmm yeah andy threatening to kill me if i even talked to francesca on the fone..yeah those were the days!!!!!! i need to get her a bf but she doesnt want one... i am in serious trouble arggh the thing is i dont wanna have these feelings for her but i do and i gotta get them out...maybe theres some kind of brain surgery or i oculd do what i did last time which was to get hypnotised into thinking were just friends but that has either worn off or sumthing weird is happening. i wish i could get back to my physics coursework but i have too many thoughts buzzing round my head. ok am gonna look up herbal remedies for my dad. if anyone knows anything about the disease ITP (ideopathic thrombocytopenia purpua) then get back to me would like to meet other people who have to deal with people who have it...my father oh god it ocudnt have happened to a nicer person he is a legend but we just have to deal with it...on that thought i am gonna try to get back to my coursework but i know ill probably be back writing in 5 mins!!

well my weekend went very well. saturday from 8 till 12 30 i had the usual saturday school. i went off and had a few fags with my mate sam before i had to go to work in glorious tesco's!! then when that finished i just came home! hmm interesting ey?/ well on sunday i had a few problems dad was kicking off again so my morning plans of meeting up with this really fit girl called sophia were put out of action. in the afternoon and the morning i spent moping around the house feeling sory for myself. but in the evening i went to megabowl in towerpark with my mates sam and luke and hayley and francesca! it was good fun and i met this georgeous girl down there called mikaela who gave i got her number and i know she didnt wrong number me coz there and then i texted her saying hi im here till 9 30 if you wanna come down and chill and she waved at me and smiled! so i dunno whats happening there. me and lizzie are not so good now but we'll be ok! emily and all her mates still apsoloutly want me dead but it doesnt really bother me anymore....my close friends havbe remained true to me and thats all i need. well right now i am supposed to be doing my physics coursework which is due in in about an hour but oh well if i fail my alevels i have ajob in tesco for life!!!!! well i better go now...also i got a comment from selene in my first box which is quite weiird because when i first started creating this blog when i had finished i checked her blog and it seems quite kool. well anyway time for the ranting and raving to stop for the moment. hopefully tell all you peeps more soon!