the microwave volcano

Mood: contemplative
Listening to: nothing

so...

*refers to title*....about who i know that i'm, actually close to...

the answer regrettably is: there there is no such person...

and when i examine it further, i recognize that ive never been close to anyone.  ive never held anyone in confidence...in that sort of way. sure ive told people of crushes, or whatever, but ive never had anyone to tell how i feel.  im so conceited.

sadly, the closest thing ive ever had to a confidant....is abner

and ive never even told him anything...

it really bugs me...everything is within me...i never let anything out...

maybe thats why my writing is so stone cold and bare.  i simply have never let it out and thus dont know how to let it flow into my writing or anything else.

anger could be my inspiration...pain...

i have acquaintances...but very few friends...

none of which would really go out of their way to call me...to talk...or whatever

its sad...

truely.

people may dissapoint you and their motives might not always be the best...but youve felt closeness...uve had close friends...

i feel like im being repetitive...

my brain knows what i mean...

i dunno...

maybe its not coming out right...

there is some point ot this...

but i just dont know.

 

*sig....