President Bush in" I'm no maniac and I'm no dunce" claim.
THE DAILY CODSWALLOP
27/10/05
"Why is everyone calling me names?", that was the president's plaintive question last night as the storm clouds gathered ominously around his presidency. The 54 year old went on to insist that he is not (as some have claimed) talking to the portraits hanging on Whitehouse walls. He went on to retort "There are millions of portraits around that place and if I was really talking to any of them , don't you think I would have started with Ronald Reagan, him being my all-time hero and all. Come to think of it, Reagan would be the only one worth talking to anyway .... well him and Herbert Hoover maybe. The American public can rest assured that If I ain't talking to those two, I ain't talking to anyone".
Bush a dunce claim
Those with long memories may recall that Richard Nixon was also said to have been in the habit of speaking to portraits during the dog days leading up to the Watergate resignation. However close aides say that, unlike Nixon, Bush is a dunce and has no interest in the portraits of past politicians. One reliable Whitehouse source has told the Daily Codswallop "If Tammy Wynette and Dolly Parton were there on the wall or the little baby Jeeeeeeesus, well that might have been a problem but Abe Lincoln? FDR? JFK? ? Give me a goddamn break, for crying out loud. Junior is bored sh*tless by history and politics and the like so why would he want a conversation with any of the dignatories hanging on the walls of the whitehouse?
Bush bone idle bastard
This plucky, wacky Prez Bush, meanwhile, admits to an uncoventional approach to running the country. "They can call it ignorance and apathy but I would remind my critics that I am the son of God and God moves in mysterious ways, and so do I. I only look lazy because Our Lord has asked me to look that way. Its to throw non-believers off the scent and prevent them from gate- crashing The Rapture".
Bush the defiant won't be changing a thing.
