More news from the kingdom

Mood: happy
Listening to: Elton John - Daniel - which always reminds me of Betty

But I told Jasmine I'd do her taxes. 
Bleah.............much as I love accounting, I hate doing taxes.

Oh, oh, oh, I went up and took pictures of the hole in the ground which will soon be the basement.  Yeehaw!

Sarah took her spoiled-brat pill yesterday.  Holy moley, she was just about as bad as she could be.  Several time outs helped, but she was giving me what-for most of the day.  Thank God she can't talk all that well or she probably would have had even more time-outs.  It was pretty funny to look at that scrunched up little face and listen to her tell me off, even if the only clear word was "GRUM-MA!" - as close as she gets to Grandma so far.  I had to walk away and giggle a few times. 

The other two have started calling her a crybaby.  I am not pleased and let them know it wasn't nice to call names.  Where are they learning such behavior?  Probably from the LF's* who live across the street.  They delight in yelling insults at people who are just out walking.  But apparently one of the little brats shits gold bricks, he's the most popular kid in the neighborhood.  Or is he just the best bully? 

Must go make pumpkin pie and do taxes.  Just got a call that company will be stopping by tomorrow and this place is in its usual state of "too much stuff" clutter and havoc.  At least we won't have to eat the whole pie by ourselves.  :-)

They started digging our foundation today!  Weeeeeeeeeeeeeee!  It seems like we've been fighting so long and hard to get to this day, when I saw the bulldozer pushing dirt around, I got so excited.........I started laughing and almost started crying.  Okay, so it doesn't look like much of anything to anyone else, but to me it's absolutely beautiful. 

Three years ago, it was a piece of wooded land.  There were trees everywhere, a pond, a bit of a clearing, a semblance of a driveway.........and the essence of a dream.  Bear had always wanted to build there, but couldn't envision living there alone, so far back from the road, away from the neighbors, all by himself. 

And then I came along.  With hopes and dreams of a life with this man who came to me when I would do anything but grow old alone.  The first time I saw the land, I knew that a house would stand there someday - that it would be our house, our home, and we would build it together. 
And so we are. 
I never knew such joy existed. 

 

Mood: angry but winding down

I tried to write earlier and got a message saying that I couldn't access the page, that I didn't have permission.  The internet is weird. 

But that's not news.

We have a mortgage.  That's scary as all get-out.  It almost didn't happen, the broker is a total idiot who started out good and then stopped returning phone calls, stopped responding to emails, told us he was coming to the house with papers we needed to go over and didn't show up....oh, and didn't bother to call and say he wasn't coming.......twice.  But it wasn't HIS fault that there were problems!  No, no, no!  It was, according to him, MY fault. 

I don't often lose my temper and it isn't pretty when it happens.  It takes me a long time to calm down when I let go, and I'm still shaking from the blow-up this morning.  I was so close to walking out, telling him to shove his money where it would do the most good - but in case there wasn't room, I was more than willing to rip him a new asshole.  But I bit my tongue - after I let him know how I felt about his total lack of responsibility.  And when we left, I told him that he was the most unprofessional person I'd ever met. 
He thanked me for my input. 

Idiot.

But now we have a mortgage and in a day or so, we'll have a well, and then a septic system, and then a basement and then walls, and then ...............a house, a home, for the Bear and me, a place that's only ours. 

And it will all be worth it, even dealing with idiots like Eric-the-invisible. 

 

 

Mood: silly

The house may actually be a reality soon..........just a few more things to do, permits to get, more happy crap, and then the ground will be broken and the foundation begun. 

It's so hard to wait.  It's wearing on both of us, we're always walking into each other and in each other's way.  I think we're going to miss that, though.  I think we're so used to looking up and seeing each other that we're going to be constantly looking for each other for a while. 

And we're definitely going to need night lights for awhile.  :-)

It's been a long road and it's still not done, but we're almost there.  I think back to the days when I would mentally arrange furniture in my dream house, and then those dreams would come crashing down because something went wrong, and it seemed like we would be here in this little place forever.  I lost hope a couple times, almost.....there was always a glimmer, a trace, I never could really totally give up because I think I would have curled up and died if I had.  And he wouldn't let me do that...........the Bear wants this as much as I do.  And we are determined to have it.  

We're both scared shitless. 

 

Mood: very tired
Listening to: the TV in the next room

I find that I just can't give up blogging.  Why is that, I wonder?  I've always kept a diary - a paper journal.  And I never wanted anyone to read it, but I someone find satisfaction is knowing that my words are out here and anyone wandering by can read them. 
I a tad nutty, I guess.

So we shall give this new blog a shot and see how it goes........the old one had too many popups, made me nuts.