Life in Middle Girth

The date on this entry says 16 May 2007 at 12 17 o'clock. It is in light grey and I can't change it so it will be interesting to see what comes up when I publish because it is actually 22 May at 10.56pm. Use current time is checked.

Okayyyyy well, I have resigned my new job shock horror. Spent a thoroughly miserable weekend and after a group discussion with hubby and friends we went to dinner with, they all persuaded me that there was no point continuing in a position that I clearly loathed and the worries of being on the job hunting scene would be less than the worries of remaining where I was. I was a bit astounded because I rather thought that having made my bed I'd have to lie in it but there you go! Yesterday I composed my letter and handed it over after lunch with fear and trepidation - once again, I needn't have worried it seems. The sky didn't fall on me, nor did my boss rage or weep - can't believe it was that easy.

What now? Well, I could go knocking on doors with my CV or I could set up my own wee temp enterprise, the trouble is I need difficult hours, say 9 - 2.30 max. Picky eh - but that's why I left my original job so there is no point in backsliding on that. So, two weeks and counting!

Will now attempt to publish that, I just cannot get the hang of how to drive this blog any more with regards to viewing recent entries. Here goes.

Can anybody shed light on why I can't get my recent blogs onto the page when I go to "View weblog"? I discovered both the previous two entries were actually there but they took a long time for me to find, yet they must pop up somewhere because I've got comments posted on them.

Any help would be appreciated.

Now I must go to work - another day in paradise. Yeah right. (Yeah right is the p.s. to many many statements, meaning we mean the complete opposite. It comes from a Tui beer ad, and is world famous - in NZ anyway.)

Just wrote a lovely blog, happiness filled following a pleasant stress-free day celebrating the B.Ed (Tchg) bestowed on daughter who even let us give her a hug -and went to publish and I think lost the lot. I only say "think" because it's taken all day to find the blog I did last night so it could be lost in cyberspace somewhere.

Won't gnash my teeth just yet, but also don't have the energy or heart to try recreating it, suffice it to say it was calm and relaxed for once. We've had a lovely day.

And reflective too, on the big gap I feel at times like this when I miss my parents - you know, when you just want to tell them things. Perhaps they know anyway.

And a random thought too - hubby thought he might just shave his head of what little hair he has (family failing, not chemo) but I hate shaved heads so I rashly said that if he did, I would too. Sure hope he doesn't!! At least it would make a change from my entire family moaning about my greying hair (it doesn't actually worry me!).

Damn I'm annoyed at losing that episode.

Mood: Tired and happy

After all my rants and moans yesterday, I've had a lovely day today.

We now have a B.Ed (Tchg) in the family - it's official! Capped and gowned and scroll presented. I guess every other mum in the Regent was busting with pride too but I reckon I was the only one who mattered. I didn't disgrace myself by blubbering although I did shed a tear or two quite by accident at the beginning as the begowned tutors filed in, pomp and ceremony often does that to me and I'm getting worse as I get older. But really, tears of pride and joy, however irrational, are excusable surely!

Nah, it was a lovely day, looooong ceremony for Small to sit through although with the aid of a pen and pad to draw on, he coped very well. Following the ceremony the two big boys wandered off round town while we adults (had Pip's late best mate's parents with us, they are her "other" parents, and Grandad) ambled down to the huge marquees in the square and eventually located Pip. She was actually quite happy to see us and suffered maternal and paternal hugs (but only one each) and we did the photo thing both there and at T.Coll and Massey - then off to lunch at The Bath House. Very nice. Then to a pub to meet with somebody and somebody's parents, (Duncs and I went to Pak'n'Save and stocked up on chips and fizz and nibbles for the expected influx at the flat tonight), took the cap and gown back to the hire place and ended up at Pip's flat - nobody else home. After a welcome cuppa and shoe removal, and quick gidday to flatties and one set of flatties grandparents who came and went, we tootled home again - so it was a long day, 8.15am to 6pm, but one that we wouldn't have missed for the world. Even managed to get a photo of all four kids looking reasonably happy together, and a few others. Wish she'd booked an official studio photo but I think some of her flatmates have one of her on her own.

I'm raving on, sorry. Brevity is not in my vocab. But isn't it all nice and positive tonight!!

Poor old husband has just had a call out - one of the only advantages of him being ill was not being on that roster but he's back on it now. Has had a couple of middle of the nights this week and they're knocking the stuffing out of him. Hopefully this early evening one will let him off a later call.

And now for tonight's random thought....

My greying hair is a bone of contention with the family - they all hate it with a vengeance but honestly it doesn't bother me, at least not as much as regrowth does, so I don't dye it anymore, not even streaks or foils which I will admit I liked (except for the price). The husband reckoned he was going to shave his off - not that he has much anyway, baldness is a family failing I'm afraid and he hasn't escaped - but I hate shaved heads so I threatened that if he did, I would too. God, I hope he doesn't!!!!

I wish my parents could have been there today, especially my Dad. I still have his degree rolled up in a tube upstairs..... It's times like this that I really, really hate being an orphan - I just want to tell them things sometimes!

Mood: Uncertain

Huge gaps are not a good idea. I have them at the moment in my blog, my journal, my very life it feels.

A quick catch up, excuse disjointedness.

Chemo: First lot finished thank God, two doses of the next lot down (6 to go) and it doesn't seem to be affecting him so far. It got very difficult towards the end of the other lot with each dose having worse and worse effects. But the good news, GREAT news is that a CAT scan about a month ago came up clear, with no mets anywhere. Oddly enough that was about when this whole thing began to hit me, maybe because I relaxed my guard?

Job: I've chucked my lovely job in. I needed to cut my hours back so I could be an after school mum to my 7 year old, and the boss wouldn't play the game so when I saw another one advertised as part time with flexible hours I went for it. Trouble is, I hate it. Sigh. But it is lovely finishing at 2.30! Homework gets done before the journey to school, tea is no longer a whirlwind affair with prep beginning as I walk in the door at a quarter to six. Washing can be put out in the morning and brought in dry after work. The money is at a slightly higher rate but only working 4.5 hours a day cuts it back again. And rostered Saturdays are about to begin - working 2 out of 3. My eyes are open for something better.

Daughter: Graduates tomorrow with  a B.Ed (Tchg) - how about that! And even better, we are all allowed to go to the ceremony. (I think that's so as we can pay for the obligatory celebratory lunch afterwards. She's already told us it won't be any use our trying to mingle with everybody else's parents as we aren't in their class.) Kirsty's parents are coming too so at least she won't be too foul in front of them. I'm terribly proud of her but am not allowed to give her even a hug, that hurts.

House: Still on the market, no nibbles, only one person through since we changed agents at the beginning of March. New plans almost complete, right down to the specs. Anticipation building (no pun intended).

Youth Hostels: we went down to Wellington a couple of weeks ago so Husband and the big kids could go to the rugby at the cake tin - a first for the males, Pip's been before. (Small and I got the better deal, we went to Mr Bean Goes On Holiday then had tea at a pancake place.) Trying to get accomodation for 6 that doesn't involve a third mortgage was tricky until we happened on the YHA site on the net. The kids were aghast - because the parents are so OLD!!! But we explained that youth hostels weren't just for youths lol. We (parents anyway) were super-impressed at the Wellington YHA - just like a hotel really, except for sharing the bathroom. Spotlessly clean, fantastic central city location, parking not a problem - and it cost $155 for all of us. Recommended to all. Also did Te Papa and many varied takeaways. Maybe next time I'll get to visit....

Son: Eldest, who was on a year's cadet scheme at the local Council has finished his time there and the promised position that would be available at the end of his contract, wasn't. He's spent quite a lot of time haymaking and carting straw, as well as being a scarer at the Maze - however, the Maze has closed now and its getting past hay and straw time. He has always spoken of joining the Navy, but has done nothing about it yet. Having a mostly unemployed 19 year old around, who isn't keen on domestic chores or board paying is fast losing it's appeal. We've tried and tried to get him motivated, but I'm wary of pushing him into something he no longer wants to try. I've sort of laid the law down - if he doesn't want to go to the Navy any more that's fine but in that case he needs to get a job. Sigh.

Enough for now? I have missed being here, have missed journalling too. It's like everything gets too hard sometimes and I go into a black hole. Actually I have been feeling a bit ? bleh ? lately, think it's a combination of mental and hormonal. Not that any bastard here gives a toss. Oh, harsh, sorry. Second son just went past and said "don't know why you bother Mum, nobody will ever read it". That's not the point though is it? That's just bloody spoilt my first entry back. Bugger.

I think I like my jewellery because choosing what to wear is a choice that I can make solely for the pleasure that it gives me. Now that's a random wee thought, just thought I'd chuck that one in.

For other times: Drifton, Goon show, shaved heads...