Weblog of Nadine

Nov 30, 2005 at 15:42 o\clock

Spinning - spinning - spinning

by: jamryn

There it goes  - again.  Everything seems to be rapidly spinning out of control. http://www.blogigo.com/jamryn1

I'm trying to keep my thoughts in control.  To have something make sence.   I'm losing - badly.

  The head feels like the inner contents are spinning so fast that my stomaic wants to give back what i've eaten.  Only problem i haven't eaten enough to do that. Like i'd want to - NOT!

Every thing seems to be in a whirlwind. Everything.  There are exciting posabilities comming  up.  There are things that need finishing.  When this happens -I know something good is comming.  Yet I also feel bad because  I  know that a lot of other - important projects  - dont get compleated. 

I wish it was as simple as going back to bed and riding it out. Waiting for the - ????whatever???? to get here.

Help - help - help - I think my head is going to explode!!!!!!!!!

Nov 27, 2005 at 23:06 o\clock

Just one.....

by: jamryn

Oh.....the power we give to words. Writen or spoken, with absolutely no emotion implyed, just one single word  can instantely transport someone back  50+ years.  Once there it has the ultimit power to KILL  ALL DREAMS, HOPE &  POSABILITIES for the past as well as the present or future.

Guns? Knives? Bombs? We don't need those things. With the correctly  written or spoked word....word's  we can  wipe out an entire nation.

Nov 27, 2005 at 00:28 o\clock

No big deal

by: jamryn

It's me just trying my best to be Human

Nov 27, 2005 at 00:19 o\clock

A different type of srrvey

by: jamryn

Did you ever.......

1.   Have your parents - not lissen to you - on purpose?

 2.   Shuffel you off on to the other parent - because they were too busy or to frustrated to deal with you?

3.   Openly agree with the teachers and school councerlor - that you were too stupid - to amount to anything?

4.   Have the man of your dreams - husband - flat out refuse to work - take off for hours, days, weeks without explination?

5.   Have the love of your life husband - get you roring drunk( in your 4th. month of pregrency) and then confess to you that he's Gay?

6.   Try to rase a colickie 1 to 2 year old as a single parent?

7.   Finaly find someone ( a new husband )who cares only to die - less than 15 years later - with 3 minor children to rase as a single ( second time around) parent?

8.   Tryed studying and doing everything the teacher asks - to find a decent job to support your familey - only to have the teacher ridicule and put down every thing you were doing?

9.   Have you ever been HOMELESS?

10.   Hurt so bad - in constent pain - all over - 24/7 only to have the doctors laugh at you and say - someone else take her - I don't know what else to do?

Have you?

I have!

Nov 26, 2005 at 22:55 o\clock

Not that anyone should Care

by: jamryn

Communication can be a dificult thing.  Especialy coming from someone who is Dyslexic and ADD.  It becomes twice as difficult when such a person has lived 55 years of their life unaware that they had eather of these two learning disabilities let alone both of them. 

As the whole saying goes ....If I had a penny for every time I heard myself refered to as dumb, stupid, half assed and backwards , I'd be twice maybe three times  richer than  Bill Gates.

People get through life doing what they have to do. Sometimes that's not always so easy. For those who may remember the late 40's and early 50's  was not exactely living on easy street for anyone. With the end of WW11 and the depresion and food rationing. Spacificaly those living out in the country. Someone had to be strong willed.

Out of my parents I guess my mother drew that straw.  Back then they called it Hen pecked. What ever way you say it - Mother wore the pants in the familey. 

Side note here - Dyslexia and ADD are inheareted. But people didn't know that back then. Nor did Mother have a clue that, that was what was bothering her. She was mearly trying to get through her life the best she knew how.

In todays day and age a women in her 30's and 40's might be enjoying her children going there teen years or becomming a grandmother. For my mother it ment dealing with a small baby and being confused as to why this child insists on doing things differently.

When $$$ gets tight, you figure out ways to make it through.  Studying to become a nurse,cleaning,cooking for a familey of 5, one of them a small  growing infant, working midnight shift, all on income that should only cover two adults - I'm sure was not easy. 

It didn't leave a lot of room for her to assure that last child that they were wanted, needed  loved or valued in any way. 

So people learn to get through life - the best they know how.   When people don't comunicate with you - you learn to communicate with them - the best you know how.

When you've been ignored for more than 90% of your life, when you've been pushed around - or to one side and preached to that you're stupid - WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU? You know the difference , and you don't repeat it to ANYONE! Preaching and pushing any of your ideas is the last thing you will ever do to ANYONE.

Remmber you're STUPID,  you don't have any ideas. So what is there to push off on someone else - like they would even lissen to you if you tryed.

Not that anyone cares......Not that I'm trying to play on anyones sympathys. Not that I beleve for a second that this might change  anyone's mind. I don't. I'm just sharing my side of the story and it's your choice to do with it what you want.

Nov 26, 2005 at 17:55 o\clock

Quote

by: jamryn

When you are at ease with yourself, you are able to utilize all your gifts and fulfill your purpose in life. You are able to give to others unselfishly and receve from them, knowing you are worthy. Opra Winfrey

Nov 26, 2005 at 17:48 o\clock

Quote

by: jamryn

Your worth consists in what you are not in what you have; what you are will show in what you (say &) do.  Thomas Davidson.

Nov 25, 2005 at 16:34 o\clock

" I've been telling the stories"

by: jamryn

That's what my son said yesterday......." I've been telling the stories...." 

It is such a wonderful feeling to get together  at Thanksgiving and Christmas with my familey and lissen to all the stories.

Ofcourse he had the facts slighetly off in his story - but just hearing him tell it is pure joy.

 The Story? 

Oh yah......it was about him.  He's now 36 strong and healthy but the story happened 34 years ago - give or take. 

 It was just him and me sharing a small two bedroom apartment.  I was employed as a nurses Aid at the local hospital.  So ......I took my son to the babysiters - in the same building that we lived in. Gave him a hug and kiss goodby - told him to be a good boy and left for work.  When I got to work - parked the car - arrived on the floor where I was scheduled - my co workers told me I was to go to the emergency room.  My son was there. 

They beat me to the hospital. It was some minor sratches or scrapes and he and the babysiter was sent back home. That was day # 1. The next day.....I take my son to the same babysitters.  I give him a hug and kiss goodby and tell him to be a good boy. 

When I get to work and arrive upon the floor where I was assigned....yep.....I'm told to go to the emergency room....my son's there. He beat me to work again.  This time the doctor  looked at me and said  ....Please dont bring him back tommorow.  I laughed and said ....I don't know ...He just might be back.

Day # 3. I take my son to the babysitters and give him a hug and kiss goodby and tell him to be a good boy. I arrive to work and go up to the floor that I'm assigned to. 

 All my co workers are laughing their heads off.  Before I can take my coat off they tell me ......you guessed it .....to the emergency room.  When I got there the poor doctor .....threw up his arms in desperation and said .....you weren't kidding - were you. 

 This time - there had been a trycycle in the hall way of the apartment building.  This trike  didn't have the rubber handle on one of the handlebars. My son was running through the hallway and managed to fall and swallow the handle bar. 

The doctor told me the child managed to do a 1/2 of a toncelectomy on himself.  I think I had the next few days offwork.

Do you have a favorite story to tell?   Check out http://www.blogigo.com/jamryn1

 

Nov 24, 2005 at 16:48 o\clock

Happy Thanksgiving to All

by: jamryn

Happy Thanksgiving to one and all.  To every soul on this earth.  whether we be - man - women - child - red - yellow - black  or white - christian - jew- hindu - athiest -etc.

As we rase our voices together as one - may they be heard by Jesus - God - Budda - or by what ever name you so choose to call him or her or it. Let our voices reflect a unified  thought of love - peace and joy.  Let this be the end of fear - hait and mistrust - FOREVER. For more see........

http://jamryn.blogspot.com 

http://www.blogigo.com/jamryn1

 

Nov 23, 2005 at 18:47 o\clock

Happy Thanksgiving

by: jamryn

Happy Thanksgiving to all my favorite blogigo buddies.........

agness29      blabbermouth       THETRUTH

aristorano    clintgriffin           thedagda

jaidedgrace      jaybee              snooter2   

 BUCK             davecathy  and    sharon

Nov 23, 2005 at 17:47 o\clock

Happy Thanksgiving

by: jamryn

Happy Thanksgiving  to  EVERYONE

This has been a good year and I'm THANKFULL  for.......Blogigo and all the bloggers

My Familey

 My Friends

A roof over my head 

Enough food to eat

Books to read

What good health that I've already got

Possabilities in the future Etc.............

Nov 22, 2005 at 15:42 o\clock

Hurray

by: jamryn

             

Hip hip hurray  BLOGIGO'S  back

Nov 17, 2005 at 22:12 o\clock

Burrr....

by: jamryn

Our first day of SNOW was yesterday - 16/11/05. Now it's beginning to look more like Thanksgiving and Christmas.  Happy Holidays everyone.

Nov 16, 2005 at 17:06 o\clock

Spread the word.......

by: jamryn

Now that we can say that you are thankfull and happy.

What about those others around you? No I don't mean just your friends and familey.

I mean your "OTHER " Familey - the poor and homeless. What are you going to do about them?

Nov 16, 2005 at 17:01 o\clock

In other words

by: jamryn

Other words for thankfullness =  Bholden Content       

Grateful         

Indebted        

Obliged       

Overwhelmed            

Pleased

Relieved              

Satisfied

Are you (incert word from above ) this Thanksgiving?

Nov 16, 2005 at 16:53 o\clock

Thankfull

by: jamryn

The dictonary definition says = Aware and Appreciative of a benefit, grateful.

Expressive of gratitude.

Can you.......list the benifits - that you appreciate?

 

Nov 16, 2005 at 16:46 o\clock

Thankfull

by: jamryn

Can you truly say.......Thank you for the second chance to write a blog....after an error message?

Nov 16, 2005 at 16:18 o\clock

Thanksgiving is comming

by: jamryn

It's comming - It's comming  in 8 days it will be here.  What are you Thankfull for......

Nov 8, 2005 at 20:31 o\clock

Smile ?

by: jamryn

for all those who need one..................

 

 

 

 

                                                    

Nov 7, 2005 at 17:22 o\clock

Lament

by: jamryn

I wish my head were a well of water

and my eyes fountains of tears

So I could weep day and night

for casualties amoung my dear,dear people. Jeremiah 9:1    

Who are the casualties of today?  I don't mean just those who lost every thing in New Orleans, Texas, Flordia or recently in Kentucky and Indiana.  They definetely need our thoughts and concerns, but are there others that we should be - side by side - expressing their's and our's - grief and sorrows? 

Does that make us feel uncomfortable? Do you like many others put a time table on the legenth of time on someone elses grief? Say - like 4 to 6 months, then assume that they should be done with it - move on now!  Snap out of it. Enough's - enough?

When I see TV. coverage of people in other countries , Weeping and wailing - it would desturb me, but I'm beginning to think they have a healthier attitude toward  this thing called grief than we do.