It's always the same time of the year that the trouble starts. First it's just an October allergy. Then it's conjunctivitis. Then it's asthma. Then it's a sore throat, post nasal drip, a torn rotator cuff. It just goes on and on forever. It never ends. I can't stand it anymore. Then there are all the people. People trying to take your money, your time -- they are too annoying to even deal with. It's better off not to even talk.
My legs are hurting. They have some tightness right above the knee. I don't know what it's from. Ever since starting SAS training, which I'll explain below, I have felt virtually bullet proof. I find my allergies have faded: I can even pet dogs, to which I have a severe allergy.
SAS training is really General Physical Preparedness (GPP). That means it teaches your body how to cope with prolonged periods of strain. A protypical exercise from GPP is "Spews". To complete a Spew you must do one push-up followed then jump up to a chin-up bar and do one chin up, then crouch down, kick your legs back and repeat the process. You try to do as many as you can in sixty seconds.
Since starting the SAS training I have lost weight and I have better stamina in everything. It's really a great thing, but suddenly, out of nowhere, my leg, especially the left one, is hurting.
I am the best mosquito killer in the world. I don't say it to brag. I just am. I can kill them with two hands, one hand, between my fingers -- I even think that if I look at them cross they fly away cause they've heard about me.
Recently, I came in contact with the silliest mosquito ever. It was bouncing around my headboard. The headboard has three spaces to put books and stuff and it bounced around off the top of it, the books, the alarm clock. It was nearly impossible to catch because it wouldn't stay still for a moment. I had finally met my match. I was impressed. Then I finally cornered it. I started in with my hand to catch it and hold and then smack it dead with the other in a lightning quick clap of death, but I noticed it split. It was two. Were they having sex?
I had no choice but to change plans. One hand closed around one and then the other hand grabbed the other. I still clapped them together and there on my palm lay two dead mosquitoes. From coitus to fucked.
I smiled. I am still the best.
http://johnshon.blogspot.com/ or http://litchaos.com/mjwriting.htm
This has some of the dirtiest writing I have ever seen. It's disgusting that someone would write this kind of thing. Horrible. The Human Race deserves more respect. It's not like missiles suddenly fly into houses and obliterate flesh and steel. Let's be civilized. Don't make fun of a girl for falling in love with you and trying to please you while simultaneously trying to get on with her life and establish a real relationship of love and stability. Do you have to spite everyone and always shit on all of them, MJ?
It's 9:20 p.m. and here comes he sneezing. It's allergy time again, right on schedule. My eyes are swollen, my nose is stuffed, my glands are swollen, and my sinuses are puffy. Horrible. I will steam shower myself now and check back in.
How do you get relief from this? I took a steaming hot bath and I still feel terrible.
I drink too much. Maybe that's the root of all the problems. I drink too much and get out of control. Before I drink I usually have allergies and then the next day is something like having the flu.
The UN believes avian flu can be a pandemic killing up to 150 million people. That is not good.
My nose itches like crazy. Seoul is a polluted city. Is anywhere dirtier? Perhaps Mexico City is. You can wash your face in the Mexican capital and find your face has turned black with grime.
I slept for a month on a hammock in Chiapas, at Palenque. I was bit by over 500 mosquitoes. The palms of my feet and hands were bit, my eyelids, even my lips. Of course it's the sound that's most infuriating. Now I never get bit--even in the rain when they all come inside to avoid being pelted by the drops. Imagine rain to them! It's like a tsunami for the mosquito.
I have had two attacks of claustrophobia or panic deep in the bowels of the Seoul subway system. It's been in the same station (Sindang Station) where I change trains. I don't know where the feeling comes from but it makes me feel like I am dying or want to die, but I am too scared and something in me holds onto life as my brain goes into a buzzsaw. It's a strange and horrible feeling.
After, since my heart races, I usually feel dehydrated and swollen. It take a few days to subside totally and I am often worried that it will come back.
How can I get over this feeling?
I dreamed that my jaw kept shutting without my desire. I was at work, but in Malaysia or some warm country. I had been attacked with a stun gun the previous night. Now, I sat with my colleagues but all of them were acting like my secretary, and the jaw kept grinding my front teeth into one another.
When I was a child I had a severe case of pneumonia and one night during the bout I dreamed that a swarm of been were chasing me and stinging me.
I believe dreams coincide with pain. Todays dream was a release of pain. Perhaps I can get better now. Or perhaps all the abuse to the body -- the parties, substances, and whatnot -- is catching up with me. There are small injuries that won't go away: hangnails, blisters, and muscular tightness.
The groin pull is a pain because my girlfriend is pretty hot and spent a lot of time at my place this weekend wearing only panties. She's a pale Korean girl. Jook-jook-bang-bang means "juicy" in Korean and that's what she is--a Korean J-Lo or Beyonce.
Well that all sounds good, you must say, but truth is every erection leads to further tightness and tenderness. Meeting her is the worst thing. She's on my bed now in panties, an unsnapped bra, and a tight t-shirt. I have to blog to stay calm. I'm 29 and still get hard when I see a woman in panties.
Behind the balls is the pain, feels like something is insie out, like a balloon will burst, like the leg and groin have been disconnected. What if I need surgery? I want this to get better but I also need sex.
It's all about care and I cannot care for myself. Can you? If you're like me you're totally out of control. My apartment is messy, my brain is messy -- I imagine my neurons are something like the computer cables that are slung behind the desk, twisted like lianas -- and my body is in pain. Now, it's a groin strain.
I say strain, but really I have no idea of the difference between a pull and a strain. I said that to a friend and he said, "that's because you haven't been injured enough!" Interesting logic, isn't it? I am happy I have not been more injured in my life, but recently everything bothers me. I have had this groin strain, back trouble, and excessive dry skin. Next I'll be suffering from chronic hangnails or something.
The problem is not the groin strain, it's the inability to cope with pain. The mind starts spinning. I hold the hurt area and remember what I read online that if the pain reduces when pushed it's a hernia. A hernia? Oh my god. They do surgery for that, don't they? I can't do surgery.
