Battles Blog

I am totally hating myself right now. I just spent probably 20 minute that I shouldnt have spent in the first place writing a response to what is going on over at SharperIron.org (http://www.sharperiron.org/showthread.php?t=2807&page=1&pp=7) and was going to copy my quick reply (which wasnt really quick into the real reply box and accidently hit the copy command again and totally lost my text. And I do not have to to retype it, so I aint gunna.
Man talk about feeling like you just got kicked in the stomach! Good thing it wasnt for class! (FYI, I hit command-S every other second when writing a paper; if only I was that smart a couple minutes ago!

Listening to: A Quiet Heart

If you dont know me at all, I am Sophomore Pastoral Studies major (music minor) at Bob Jones University. As my campus job, I work at the music company BJU owns called SoundForth. We yearly put out a CD featuring students, former students, staff, and faculty of BJU. This year's is called A Quiet Heart (SoundForth Singers and Orchestra). It is supposed to be supplement to Dr. Berg's new DVD series called Quieting A Noisy Soul (check out quietinganoisysoul.com for more details). A 30-second preview can be listened to at SacredAudio.com of all the songs on A Quiet Heart, and many many more CDs.

Here is the text from one of my favorite songs on the CD called

I Could Not Do Without Thee

Words by Francis R. Havergal
Music by Craig Curry
Orchestration by Dan Forrest
Kristin Alexander, soloist

© Copyright 1997 by Beckenhorst Press, Inc. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

I could not do without Thee,
O Savior of the lost,
Whose precious blood redeemed me,
at such tremendous cost.
Thy righteousness, Thy pardon,
Thy precious blood must be
My only hope and comfort,
my glory and my plea.

I could not do without Thee,
I cannot stand alone.
I have no strength or goodness,
no wisdom of my own.
But Thou, beloved Savior,
Art all in all to me,
And weakness will be power
If leaning hard on Thee.

I could not do without Thee,
O Jesus, Savior, dear;
E’en when my eyes are ‘holden,
I know that Thou art near.
How dreary and how lonely
This changeful life would be
Without the sweet communion,
the secret rest with Thee.

I could not do without Thee,
For years are fleeting fast,
And soon in solemn loneness,
The river must be passed.
But Thou wilt never leave me,
And though the waves roll high,
I know Thou wilt be near me,
And whisper, “It is I.”

I have recently listened to two of Joshua Harris's sermons on courtship. While I do not agree that courtship is okay for everyone, he definitely has has some good biblical proof behind his points. I have enjoyed all 4 of his books, particularly the 2 on relationships.

Here is most of the post I wrote on this past summer on relationships. I may come back after a few days with some comments and learning I have done since I wrote this:

>>>>>>> July 14, 2005

Many people have asked me, "Do you have a girlfriend? No? How come? You had better get moving!" While I appreciate their concern, I am taking things as slowly and as cautiously as possible. Why? you ask? Because, as I told one of my friends at work today, I want to present myself to my Lord someday in Heaven as best as I can. I know that I cannot be totally without sin. But that should be our goal. I see so many men and women, unfortunately most of the time young boys and girls, Christian and non-Christian alike that do not care what happens in a relationship as long as their thirst for attention is satisfied. Is that what a relationship is about? Is that God honoring? I do not believe so, and I do not believe the Bible says so either.

A relationship, both in "just friends" and "more than just friends" relationships need to be God-centered. Whether it be hanging out with "the guys" or that "one" that you get starry eyed just thinking about, needs to be God-centered.

As a preacher boy at BJU, the preacher boy professors constantly drill into you about the importance of a godly wife. They say it will make or break your ministry. I am very thankful for the godly women that the Lord has placed in my life. My mom being chief. She has taught me so much. I know that I will never repay her for all the "foot talks" we had on the couch, and instruction she has given me. Two other women that have made an impression on my are my pastor and [former] youth pastors' wives (or would it be wifes?). Angi Humburg and Jennifer Linscott have been great examples of a godly but submissive pastor's wife. I pray for a combination of those three women or something of the sort.

I know that the Lord has not given me the "gift of celibacy" as the preacher boy professors call it. I know that, I will be married someday. (That is, if the Lord tarries). I am a normal guy. I long for companionship. I long for a wife that will help me in my ministry and love to do it.

The Lord has not provided that girl/woman yet. I know she is out there.

So why I do I not have a girlfriend? Many reasons, but one is because I am taking my time, not willing to waste both my and my "girlfriend"'s time and energy on a relationship that is going no where.

Josh Harris has 2 excellent books on relationships: I Kissed Dating Goodbye, and Boy Meets Girl.
While I dont agree with everything he has to say in those books, he is definitely serious when it comes to relationships, and does not want to mess around.
In Boy Meets Girl, he tells the story of David and Claire and how they become married, and the process they went through.
Here are the rules that David set up for himself before he would consider a relationship (or courtship):

1) Am I prepared to lead my wife spiritually and serve her in every way?
2) Do I have proven character, and am I growing in godliness?
3) To whom and to what am I accountable?
4) How am I involved in the church? What are my gifts and ministry areas? What are hers?
5) Are my motiives for pursuing marriage selfish and worldly, or are they to honor God?
6) Can I provide financially?
7) What do my pastors and parents have to say?

These are all very good questions, some of which I do not have a good answer. Hence why I am not pursuing anyone yet.
But I beg for another question. While this is not a quote of his or paraphrase, this is a question Dr. Jim Berg might ask.

8) Am I disciplined in both my walk in life and my walk with God?

I have pondered that question of myself many times. And I do not think that I am disciplined enough yet. I have and am struggling with the use of my time. If I cannot make use of my time while I am single, how can I make use of it when there are two of us?

Paraphrasing one of my professors at school, he said "If you wait around until you are perfect, or are sure that she is the right one, you will never get married! You will never be sure she is the one until you hear her say 'yes.' Then you can sigh with relief." I got a kick out of that when I first heard it.

Someday I will have a girlfriend who will be come my wife, and when I do so, I pray that I do all I can to honor God both with our lives. When I do have a girlfriend, I will not just have a girlfriend to have a girlfriend. She and others will all know that I intend on at least considering marriage. Anything less is stealing time and energy from her and myself and most importantly, my relationship with the Lord.

>>>>>>>

Listening to: Symphonic Metamorphosis

This is my new blog. I have blogspot one, but since BJU blocks it, I dont have access at all to it. So, I dont know if I will have time to keep it running or not, but it will at least give me a place to vent and to write a llittle bit. I will also try to put some of the articles I wrote for my other blog on here. Have fun reading!