meaningless insights

Mood: cynical
Listening to: John Lennon

I would love to be wondering why 'birds sing so gay...'

Instead I find myself wondering why I have just spent a good nine hours of my Sunday (a sunny one at that) taking my work home.

I feel like my responsibilities are welling up to create an anxious tsunami of panic. I dont usually get like this.

So I wonder why I am feeling so bad. I can't work harder. I don't think I can work any smarter.

Oh don't worry, I am not doing all of that 'victiming' stuff. That mentality gives me the shits - if I catch myself with those thoughts I give myself a good metaphoric slap across the face.

I just feel a touch powerless at present. That is a position that I don't allow myself to be in ever.

So... I am wondering how to fix this.

Instead I am going to have a shower and wash my hair. I am so tired that I am going to crash into bed with my hair wet.

If I could 'pray' I would pray that my vitamin B tablet will powercharge me through tomorrow.