All The Small Things

Dec 10, 2006 at 11:51 o\clock

Serves me right for being cocky.

by: Sassy1

Well, things are not so peachy keen today.

Last night I went to a party with GM, and it was great.

I arrived pretty late, because I'd been babysitting. When I got there he wasn't drunk, he'd had a few but he was OK. He took me round and introduced me to his friends, which was nice.

About 2.30am we were sitting round the table with 5 other people, the last ones up. GM said to me quietly, where do you want to stay tonight darl? I said I'd like to go home. He say's no worries, I'll follow you round. I don't think so, I said, you're too drunk. Ill drive you if you like, and we'll come back for the car in the morning. Nah, he say's, I'll stay here then. Fine, whatever you like, but I'm going home.

His friend (who's parents house it was) asked us then where we were going to stay. GM say's, we'll stay here.

Righto, says his mate, I'll make up a bed for you. I have a double mattress up in my room.

No, thats OK, I'm going to go home, its only five minutes away and I've got things to do in the morning but thanks anyway. Says I.

No worries. Says the friend, looking askance at GM, who has now cracked another drink open.

He then proceeded to drink as we were talking until he passed out in the chair beside me.

One of his other mates gets up, I'm off to bed, he says. Would you like a hand to take him up to your room?

No, I'm not staying. Thanks anyway.

So what will we do with him then?

I don't know. Personally, I'd be inclined to leave him there, but I guess thats up to you.

Oh.

Yeah. Goodnight then.

And off he toddled.

 

I said my goodbyes to the host, who was really very lovely, and asked that he say goodbye to GM in the morning for me. What will I do with him? he asked as I left. I'd leave him there, really, he knew what he was doing, why should you have to look after him. Leave him there.

He looked at me like I was the most heartless bitch he'd ever met.

Goodnight then. Nice to meet you.

You too. Goodnight.

 

This left me feeling really pissed off for a couple of reasons.

A. I'm not his mother, or his nursemaid. It isn't my job to look after him. Passing out in order to force me to look after him is not going to work.

B. He's 26 years old. He should know his drinking limits by now. No-one else at the party drank like that, and its freaking embarassing, not to mention dangerous and stupid. If you are the only person in the place who passes out, then you have a problem.

C. I do not want to spend my life with an alcoholic. No matter how nice they are to me between times. And I am rather afraid that he is drinking to the point where that is not a rediculous label to put on him. (Also, this runs in his family, I have discovered. He would be fourth generation. Thats pretty serious history to deal with.)

D. He hasn't contacted me at all, and now he's gone away for four days to fight fires. What sort of person wouldn't ring and say something after that happening????

 

I really feel that I deserve better than that. What do YOU think???

Comments for this entry:

  1. quoteJobe wrote at Dec 10, 2006 at 12:53 o\clock:I think you may be right. Having the odd big night is fine but if you're going to do it every time and put people out...
  2. quoteJtH wrote at Dec 11, 2006 at 05:59 o\clock:Exercise caution. I've had personal history with the alcoholic family member before and it's not worth the fight. Passing out once is what happens once in a while, say every 10 years at those milestone events. Doing it regularly is disaster.
  3. quoteMaria wrote at Dec 11, 2006 at 08:28 o\clock:I have just finished a relationship with someone that liked to drink too much. And you know what I learnt? Someone like that will never change, especially if "alcoholic" is in their family history. Having to look after someone like that, and worrying about if they will get themselves into trouble when drunk, or have an accident if they are stupid enough to drink drive, seriously isn't worth it.
    If you aren't happy with the way he behaves now at the beginning of a new relationship, then he's unlikely to change his ways further down the track.
  4. quoteSassy1 wrote at Dec 11, 2006 at 12:30 o\clock:Well guys, I still haven't heard from him.

    And love is a verb, right?

    Thanks for your advice, one and all, I think you are right - I'm not going to be able to change him, and this is something that needs sorting now rather than later.
  5. quotej-flo wrote at Dec 13, 2006 at 13:36 o\clock:He is being a total asshole jerk and how alienating for you to be left to say goodbye to his friends because he is such a great partner to you that he is passed out. And for his friends to think you should look after him, like he's sick instead of pissed. And then for him 1) not to call but even worse 2) go off doing something dangerous whereby you will worry about him - and him not to call to say hes alive....totally asshole-ish. I would love to know how he justifies being in the wrong & not calling. Good on you for leaving his drunk ass at the party.

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