Re-connection
Last night, out of the blue, I got a phone call from a friend of mine who lives in Melbourne. She was visiting for a little while, and wanted to catch up for coffee.
So we met at the coffee shop, and she bought her lovely fiance with her. It got me to thinking about a couple of things.
One: How awesome is it when your friends have partners / boyfriends / fiances / husband types who just fit in, and are happy to catch up with you too. I love that!
I remember when we were all a tad younger, and we could go for months stealing time together as mates, because one hated the others boyfriend, or the boyfriends hated each other, or their girlfriends other friends. That really sucked.
We've probably all been guilty of it at one time or another, but how fantastic is it when you can all get along, and its just a bunch of friends going out together. I love you guys.
We also discussed briefly the concept of being "good enough". We so often judge other peoples relationships, or our own, on this idea that we hold a certain degree of value, and that those around us hold a distinct value also, and that somehow, those values should be equal to one another for a relationship to be completely valid.
For example: We have a friend who behaves like a fool in his relationship. His erstwhile girlfriend is a lovely girl. Consensus is that he "isn't good enough for her" and that she can "do better".
What on earth do we mean by that? Obviously she deserves to be treated better, but does that mean that there are people out there who are better people than our friend?
I know that Almost would be horrified with the guy I am sort-of-seeing. Realistically, he's not "good enough". That isn't to say that he's a less than fantastic guy, he just isn't the guy for me.
But who am I to say that another person isn't good enough? How can we assign a value on a scale that reads
not good enough____________good enough______________too good
I just have trouble with that. It's more an issue of suitability, isn't it, not value. Perhaps it is just symantics. I can be a bit anal about language sometimes.
All I know is that I'm not that comfortable saying that someone isn't good enough for another person. I don't think that one person holds a higher intrinsic value than another. There are people who are well suited, and those who are not. So that's how I'm going to call it.
I would hate for someone to say about me, "She isn't good enough for him".
Not that that would happen, because lets face it, I live in Sassville, and the chances of me finding an equal here are slim, let alone a "better".
Ho Hum.
Happy Easter by the way.
