All The Small Things

What an unusual weekend I've had.

Friday night I went to a Tupperware Party - haven't been to one of those in ages. My my my, how Tupperware has changed. Now its all "Shiny, non-porus, dishwasher and microwave safe and in a range of stylish colours" or very very latex-y and designed to bake in.

There was this amazing woman there (and I use amazing in the sense of "She was amazingly perculiar and should probably be in a glass case on display somewhere") who seriously owned everything out of the catalogue. EVERYTHING. $300 saucepan? Got it. Little slice and dice whizzy thing? Got it. The ENTIRE PANTRY PACK, FREEZER SET AND BBQ SETTING SET? Got it. I don't even know why she came to the damn party really.

She was larger than life. She went on to discuss all of the different things that she had purchased, and the various ways that she had hassled sales staff until they gave her the most incredible discounts on things. After spending time with her at the party, I would completely give her a discount to get her the hell out too.

After the Tupperware Party, I headed out to GM's, where, as usual, there was a party going on. Thankfully this time it was a rather quiet party, because I was knackered. I piked early (one am) and went to bed. GM joined me about 3am, and I think, in all, I got about four hours sleep. I am not complaining AT ALL, but having said that, I am thinking that we're going to have to start going to bed about 8am if I am ever going to get a decent nights sleep in that house. And we're going to have to sleep at my place on a Friday night if we've got an early start on Saturday. But the parties are great fun, and I don't often have early starts on the weekends.

Saturday I timekept at the footy for three games in a row. It was actually quite good fun, a beautiful day for it, and the lads were pretty good to watch.

After the footy, I headed home, did a spot of housework, had dinner, then I headed out to meet up with GM, who was having a commiserative beverage with his footy boys, who had bombed out of the finals earlier in the day. When I arrived there were probably a dozen stayers, all pretty maggotted, two girls and the rest were lads.

One of the girls I knew, and I hadn't seen in ages, so we had a good old chat at the bar. Behind the bar was my lovely GM and another fella, lets call him The Tease. The Tease and I go way back. He's made a habit of flirting outrageously with me since the first time that we met. He walks past me in the pub and blows in my ear, in a way that makes my insides turn to jelly. Poorly, poorly set jelly.

So he was behind the bar with GM. As I walk in, he says to GM, "Who's that?" GM replies "Sass" "You know, she's the best looking chick for miles round here."

"I know," says GM, "She's my missus"

I walk up to the bar at this point, say hello to GM, hello to The Tease, who says, "G'day, I didn't know that you and GM were together. Congratulations, he's a top bloke."

"Thankyou, I know." and we went on to chat about all manner of things.

After all the lads had had their fun making fun of GM, who came round the bar and gave me a cuddle and a kiss, "Oooohhhh, check out GM - smooth on and off the field" and so on, we went and sat around the fire. Some people went home, until all that were left were GM, myself, the girl I knew and her boyfriend, an incredibly drunk footballer and The Tease. The others went outside to watch one of the boys who was leaving do circle work on the golfcourse (is there anything more quintessentially Aussie than circle work on the golfcourse, maggotted, after the game?).

The Tease and I were alone by the fire, me because it was cold out, and circle work doesn't really interest me, and him because he wanted to talk to me it would appear.

"So I guess I won't be blowing in your ear anymore"

"Nah, I've got GM to do it for me now."

"He won't do it like I did though."

"Probably not!" laughing

"You wanted to sleep with me, didn't you?" Serious tones, teasing eyes.

"I beg your pardon?"

"You wanted me, you can't deny it." Cocky as hell.

"I'm not answering that." Laughing.

"Oh, come on, you know it'd be great." Serious.

"Probably would be, but we'll never know now will we. I'm happy with GM, and you have a girlfriend. Besides, I'm an old lady compared to you, you shouldn't even be thinking thoughts like that about me!" Teasing.

"You're one year older, who cares. Yeah. GM's a good bloke. Tell you what we should do? We should make a deal." Serious.

"What kind of deal?"

"We should sleep together. When you're single, and I'm single, lets just do it. We both want to, we know it'd be great, lets do it." Serious

"Are you serious?" Laughing

"Yeah, serious." Serious.

"Righto. If I'm single, and you're single, I'll make that deal." Laughing.

He makes a move to shake my hand, so I put my hand out to shake his, and he suddenly sticks out his pinky finger. "Pinky swear"

Laughed my ass off.

"Righto. Pinky swear."

Then everyone else came back in, and I spent the rest of the night snuggled up with GM.

 

Before you start thinking that I'm a terrible hussy for making this deal, there are two or three things you should realise.

1) I love GM, and I plan on being with him for at least an extended period of time, possibly forever. Therefore this deal will never become activated. (I was thinking this as I asked if he were serious, and that's mainly why I said yes and did the pinky swear)

2) The Tease has a long time girlfriend, whom I believe he loves (though he does have a very odd way of showing it sometimes, and they never go out together) I rather think he'll marry her actually. Again, this will rend the deal null and void.

3) I rather think he was teasing anyways, and didn't mean it. Seriously, who pinky swears? Though if by some odd, bizarro chance he did mean it, and for some unforseen reason GM dropped off the planet, and so did his long time girlfriend, then I guess there would be worse things than sleeping with him. Considering that he is probably one of the hottest guys in town, I could definitely think of worse things.

Do you think that this makes me a horribly bad person? Feedback via the usual channels, don't lets be shy!

 

GM came home with me, and stayed at my place. It was lovely. We got up really really late (please note that I said got up, not woke up?), and went down the street and had breakfast together. Bliss.

The more time I spend with GM, the more I love him. In the car on the way home we had a talk about Nicky, and him meeting her. You may have noticed that I'm a little nervous about this - not in a bad way, just because I really want it to go well.

He says to me "I'd like you to promise me something. Don't stress about me meeting Nicky. I know you're worried, but don't stress about it. I love you, I'm sure that it'll go great. I can't wait to meet her. I've got the most beautiful little poddy that I've brought over for her to meet, have a play with and feed, and she'll have a great time."

I know she will. I'm sure it will go beautifully. I'm sure he'll love her too. (I'm still nervous)

We've set another date for us to go out to the farm - this coming Tuesday afternoon. I am trying not to get too attached to the date, because our track record has been shite, and who knows what might go wrong between now and then to make one or either of us unavailable.

I'm beginning to get nervous about the upcoming engagement party that we're going to (his sister got engaged) because all his family will be there. I guess I kindof thought when he invited me that I'd have met most of the local family members by now, but I haven't. And its only a fortnight away.

A million questions: What should one wear? How does one greet family members of the man one loves if one has never met them before? Particularly fathers? And what kind of footwear is appropriate for such an event? God. This stuff is so HARD. I feel completely out of my depth, and I really want them to like me.

I feel about 12 right now. I think thats my cue to shut up, don't you?