All The Small Things

Today I had a beautiful girlfriend in at work, the one that I helped move not that long ago.

We were talking about Sassville, and she was telling me that she'd been speaking to her mother.

She said that she'd told her mum that they wouldn't be moving back to where they'd come from, they'd be staying here.

I remember the first time we met, she was telling me about how unhappy she was, and how much she missed her old home. I really didn't think that she'd stay.

So I said "Are you happy here then?"

She started to cry. "I've never had friends like I've got here. I was there for 8 years, and I never had such good friends."

I started to cry too.

 

We really do have the most magnificent group of girlfriends here.

 

It got me to thinking, that in my life I've been so incredibly blessed. I have a bunch of girlfriends that I've been friends with since primary school, more who joined the team in high school. We might not talk much, God, on the whole, we are some of the worst damn communicators out. But I think that we all know that if one called up and needed us, we'd be there.

No questions. No excuses. Just be there.

 

And now I'm in this new place, a different life really. And I have this new group of friends, and they are equally as amazing as my school friends. Obviously we don't have the collective history that the original crew do, but in some other and more intrinsic way, the relationships are quite similar.

 

My "old" friends, we may not see each other for a year, or even more, and when we get together it just clicks. We aren't talking about old stuff, we're talking about our lives as they are now. I think we probably have a knowledge of the souls of the people in our group. We don't know stuff about each other, we know each other on that deeper level. The level that allows you to crumble the walls and not talk shit about being fine when you aren't. There isn't anything remotely bullshit about our friendships, no pretending, or faking.

The sort of friendships that will endure forever, I sincerely hope.

 

My new friends are much the same. We don't have any pretentions in our relationships. We cry, support and are there for each other.

I don't think that most people have that sort of relationship even with their school friends, which is truly sad. I think you need people who knew you when you were young and stupid and naive, when you had a mullet (nb: I had some terrible haircuts as a younger person), or wore flannel, or dated complete dickheads. People who can remind you how far you've come, who can tell embarrassing stories to your kids or at your milestone birthdays.

I think as you get older it becomes harder to make friendships that are of this quality. Sure, we make friends at work, or in our sporting clubs, with the neighbours or at playgroup. But these can be transient. A new job, a new house, an injury, kids growing up. These things tear away at the fabric of those friendships, until you have nothing left in common and they disintergrate.

I really do feel very blessed that I've got the most incredible friends in my life. Both those who are spread round the countryside, near and far, and those with whom I get to share Sassville.

 

Here endeth the sap.

 

And for your patience: Have you ever heard oral sex referred to as special kisses? Discuss.