I'm back in town, oh yeahs.
So I've decided to come back again! The other place just didn't work out. I believe that it happens a lot - bloggers get the wonderlust, then realise, Dorothy-Style, that there is no place like home!
So let me tell you about my new fella.
Or not so new fella as the case may be. He's been around for a while now, but I haven't. So he's new to me, not so new to you I guess 
(My apologies to Sambo who has already heard all this!)
His name shalt be Ellvis, with two L's here so as to confuse that blinking search engine which might reveal us to suspicious boyfriend types looking for their girlfriends blogs and insider information on what makes her tick etc.
That is his nickname in real life, and the reason that I avoided meeting him for so long. My dear girlfriend and her husband kept trying to set us up, but I was imagining this greasy, chubby, slimy old guy with big badly dyed hair and half a hamburger hanging from his mouth.
So eventually they lured / nagged me into attending an evening hotplate centred al fresco dining experience. When I arrived I walked in and viewed a very attractive, quite well built young man in the kitchen. "Holy crappoli!" I expressed with all of the eloquence at my command; "Who is that gorgeous creature?"
"Thats Ellvis!"
Mmm.
So we've been on and then we were off for a period, but we're back on again now. During the time we were off, we were really on, if I'm going to be completely honest with you.
I mean, I did tell people that we were just friends... but we were friends with benefits that can make a girls head spin and twirl and make other parts of that same girl sing better than any of the current crop of Australian Idols... oh yeah.
Uhm, where were we?
Little distracted... lol
Right, Ellvis. So we're on like donkey kong now. And its beautiful. Its effortless. It was hard to get used to, but I'm really enjoying his kindness and how well he treats me.
Life is pretty good.
Mr. D. is still a dick. Thats a given though. He actually SENT BACK the gifts that Nicky purchased for him for Fathers Day. What kind of person does that??? She was crushed.
SHE is not allowed near me, thanks to the beautiful legal system in this fine country of ours. Thank god for laws against being an utter dangerous nutjob.
They've bred again - another mouth to feed, another bogan name. Ho Hum. This one has a penis, so maybe that'll be an end to it. Maybe not. I don't think she knows what causes it - Whoops! I'm preggers again! She's like a way less classy version of Britney Spears.
God its good to be back. I wouldn't have EVER written that at the other place!!
