Why Do I Feel Invisible...?

Jul 18, 2005 at 21:12 o\clock

I Knew It Was Coming...

Mood: Kinda Crappy
Listening to: Nickleback - Good Times Gone

Today Martin asked me if i was still cutting... he saw my arms on the weekend, and i hate lying to him, i hate lying to my family and friends, trying to say i have stopped.. i havnt, i cant, i just cant, im finding it so hard, espeshially when i know there are blades all over my room.

I really want to stop, its so hot i cant wear long sleeves n jackets forever but when i get so hot i have to take em off, then people like see em so obviously and i cant hide them much longer :/

But enough bout that or ima cry again :/

God things with me and Mart are going faster than i thought, i mean what did i expect if i was sleeping over his, like i just dont wana go too fast so things fuck up:( I want to make sure he really means he loves me, or he just thinks he does.. i mean things went further than i expected anyway, i mean he fucking went down on me... among other things! And i knew where things where going so i just said i was too tired :/ Coz i dont want to have sex and find that i was just some easy shag :/

I cant really think of anything to write, dont see much point tho :/ No point in doing anything anymore...

<3333333


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