life of a Princess

Mood: sad and crying
Listening to: photograph

~Hold On~

I sit here in a puddle of tears

why do I hold on?

I cry time and time again,

why do I hold on?

you made me feel so loved, and wanted,

why do I hold on?

I toss and turn dreaming of you,

why do I hold on?

YOU hold my heart in your hands,

why do I hold on?

For everything we share, for all we are and can be together...

this is why I hold on!

I miss you Nick

Mood: upset ...and MAD!
Listening to: listen to your heart

I am going thru withdraw...I need to be with my baby again! I cant believe Ive made it this far. I just need to tell him I love him. I love you HUNNY! You are the best!

Mood: happier

I am so happy ...things couldnt be any better...I hope nothing goes wrong Tomorrow I have to take the little kids next door to school ...how fun...Im talking to Nick....I'll write later

Mood: happy....

I took the little kids to school....it was kinda fun ...Alex talked the whole way there...like he always does! Its hard to keep up with him sometimes. Jesse and Anna are gonna be up this weekend...we are all going to the Ren. Fair...YAY! Im not so sure if I want to go ..but if I do I want Crystal to go with me....Hey Crystal...."where's my purse?" lol "on your arm.." haha fun times The things we do! Well anyways....gtg for now ...write later...

Mood: sad

Im doing so bad...I dont know what to do..I cant get ahold of anyone to talk to! Im gonna go insane! I swear! I am not myself ..but this is how it has to be ...sorry Nick

Mood: ahhh

This day isnt good at all .......I cant really do anything I want too ...I cant be with who I want to be with ......my computer stoped working ...until now ....I just wish I could talk to Nick....im gonna go

Mood: ahhh....

Well today my computer didnt work for school...couldnt do my daily assignments of oriantation....Chris came over... He wanted to watch "a walk to remember " with me ...but turns out the dvd we rented was all scratched up ...so we didnt have to watch it ....lol I texted Nick at work today.....I didnt get a reply ...but when I got home mom told me he did call 2 times ....and then my computer started to work ...out of the blue (thank God) then I got to emails from him....yes when I did text him I was pretty upset...but now that I calmed down ...I realized that ..nothing can be done about any of this ..and its ok...I just hope nick isnt really freaking out.....I hope hes ok I dont think he wants his coweyed cute nose small eared Mexican Princess worried about him lol

Mood: confused

Today my heart just aches...I told Nick to forget about me ...to not come down every 3 months ...and that it would just be easier on the both of us. Well today the Litonians (Littlestown) go back to school! HAHAHA well I guess its not so bad....what am I saying yeah it is ... Im already done my oriantation for today so yeah I got nothing to do....just waiting to see if Nick calls or something...I dont expect him too but he might...Mrs. Bonnie is giving me $25 a week to take the kids to school ...I was gonna use that money to go to Canada ...but I dont think so anymore....I might just get that tattoo that I wanted...I dont know...we'll see how things go.... I dont think I want things to be different then what i told Nick last night so yeah Im probably gonna get that tattoo.. I wonder when my Aunt Trina and her boyfriend Kieth are coming to the house I gotta meet this guy and see if I like him. I know I will if Trina does....shes got a good head on her shoulders ....just like me....hahaha yeah right ...well I'll write later

I just told Nick I didnt think he should come down anymore... I told him not to call me Princess anymore .....and that I couldnt handle this anymore

Mood: pissed

I am so pissed off right now ....my stupid computer will NOT work for school ...which probably means I will need to go to a different school Maybe I should just take Nicks help and move to Canada...I dont know how we would pull it off ...Im now 18...I might just think about it. Things arent any better here ...(Nick knows) I'lll do anything to be happy.....I just need to figure out what..and how ...and when.....