Planet Nergeedor

Friends---I've never had any. I've had a lot of people tell me that I'm their  friend only to find out that they want something in return. I've had people in my life who have never asked me for anything but if they were real friends, Where are they now? If they truly cared about me, they would have kept in touch with me when they moved away. Certain people who claimed that I was "very important" to them have kept in touch with other people but not me. It's hard for me to even talk to chicks because they always try and start drama with me. At my old job the chicks would constantly talk about how the guys flirted with me and they'd get attitudes with me. They didn't realize that they guys flirted with me because I wasn't throwing myself at them and I always had a "smart ass" comment. Our job was boring, they didn't really want me.They wanted to be entertained! And even if they did want me, how is that my fault? It's easy for me to become friends with guys because I usually have more in common with them but they all just freak out and stop talking to me. I mean it's happened countless numbers of time. I can say maybe it's because they had romantic feelings for me and they didn't like to hear me talk about men that I was interested in but that doesn't make sense. I'm 100% sure that they weren't interested in me that way. It's like they didn't want me but they didn't want me to have anyone else either. Some were just trying to get sex and when I said no they moved on I guess. I've spent countless hours trying to figure out why I can't keep friends and the only thing I can think of is that I don't need friends, so I have no reason to put up with being treated poorly. Most people I know have friends who use them, lie to them, sleep with their boyfriends, steal from them and they just let the people treat them that way. I have been through ENOUGH drama in my life and I'm just not going to deal with anything else. People have told me that I'm "unforgiving" and that is just not true! If I no longer want to punch you in the forehead then in my book that means I'm over it and the person is forgiven. I don't think forgiveness means I still have to converse with the person.... I don't know...I'm just depressed and lonely today.