Mey's Journal

Jan 25, 2006 at 18:09 o\clock

Slowly...but surely

by: mey2

Mood: OK

OK.  I have had a good day today.  I did loads at work and managed to really sort a few things out that have been hanging for ages.  So now I am pretty much up to date at work and that feels good!
I felt a little happier today.  I sent an email to my mum and told her about the counselling bit.  I also said that hubby had booked a holiday in Austria and that although I was looking forward to see the mountains and the snow, I was dreading being with him with no escape... no last minute 'I am going out to see Sarah' escuse to get out of the house.... I am hoping however that we'll be so knackered after skiing all day, we'll be in bed early!!  I am planning to spend as much time with the kids and play in the snow with them.  My mum replied that she was happy I was not making any harsh decision just yet and that I was taking my time.

I am worried that she thinks I will be all ok soon and that it was just a bad dream... But this morning, after he had his shower, he came in the room half naked and I just could not look at him.  Then he started talking and I thought 'I dont like his voice'.  Then I saw the back of his head and thought 'I hate his hair in the back of his head..all little and curly'.... If I ever feel in love with him again it will take a long long time.... and that is a IF... not a WHEN. 
I personally can't see it coming.  But as everybody around me say... You never know!

I am going out on Saturday for Sarah's birthday and I know I should be looking forward to it.  My friend Sam just came for a cup of tea earlier and told me she could not go cause her dad had a car crash and she was going to Cardiff on Friday.  Which means that her hubby...My hubby's best friend, is going too.  And I was hoping that the two of them would spend Saturday night together so I would be free of nagging texts on my phone asking me where I was or who I was with!!
So now, I am going out hoping he will behave and leave me the hell alone.  Otherwise I will tell him that...errrr... I will take the opportunity of him being an arse once again and make out with some strangers on the dance floor as a revenge scheme...LOL.  That should shut his mouth!!!

No... I really hope he will not nag me that night cause I really want to let my hair down and enjoy it to the fulll.  I need it!!!

Better cook the kids dinner.  It looks like they haven't been fed for days according to their whining!!


Comments for this entry:

  1. winteryweather wrote at Jan 25, 2006 at 20:32 o\clock:Mey...don\'t worry about a banner yet...I may change it back...I just don\'t want anyone to find this ya know what I mean!!!! I did a google search of my other name and it came up and know about certains finding out! Hope your holiday is great...I am jealous! Take some great mountainous pictures and send them to me!!! Take care and thanks for the comment...I do miss you ya know!!! We don\'t catch each other online anymore...such busy little lives we lead! Later Gator...


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