...:::Carl Himself:::...

Jan 25, 2005 at 09:42 o\clock

Money, yeah i miss that stuff and GUN FOOD

Mood: --
Listening to: all on black alkaline trio

Well as it currently stands i am poor and in debt to my mother. i was meant to get my ema bonus on friday but no, that did not happen, so i am a hundred pounds down. Last week my guitar teacher asked me if i wanted to buy a chorus pedal of him for twenty quid, assuming that i would have my bonus by then i thought yeah i can afford that so i told him i'd buy it off him today, all so i have to lend 35 quid of my mum for my system of a down ticket which i need today, she is giving me her bank card - crazy - also i want my death from above 1979 ticket for next friday but at this rate it doesn't look like i'm going to be able to afford it, and i ahve payments to amke on my new computer and basically i need to buy beer, so ste is loaning me ten pounds tonite - crazy - and i'm gonna owe him some money, but in the long run i'll be okay.
     And to make things worse i am almost depressed i swear, i miss my ex girlfriend a hell of a lot, (far too much for what she is and how she makes me feel feel these days, which is utterly worthless and like i wasted 7 months of my life, suppose i had nothing better too do anyway tho) but i can stand her either, and i want her even tho i can't and thats what makes it so much worse, and its not like i even miss her i just miss the feelin of being completly comfortable with someone that knows everything about you.
     I'm not alone alot these days but i feel it, i mean i can always talk to my mum because she is more of a friend to me than anything but she just has too much going on to care, my best friend Ste, i know he'd listen but i'd never force my shit on him and talk bollockss to him, Why? because even tho he is my best friend laughing is what we do best, laughing at people and other stuff. Like yesterday we went to Morrisons in the morning and bought five doughnuts each and he was talkin about how they are gun food as it's all the american police eat and how they shoot anybody, proof i suppose that doughnuts are gun food, "they even have a hole in them where they have been shot! it's true dude doughnuts = gun food"



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