I cry through my skin.

Mood: Depressed

 Well, I went to my cutter girl's group today...I really didn't like it. Everyone just seemed really apethetic. This includes myself. Oh, and guess what? I cut. Ha, irony. I was debating killing myself...But then, my old friend came over and I can't really kill myself when someone is over...That would be bad hosting skills. I really hate that suicide isn't the worst thing I can think of...Some people think it's positivly atroscious(excuse the spelling...) that I think of killing myself so often. I used to be able to understand that thought process...But now, I can't. It's just so normal for me....Every day...Depression is there, the lingering thought of cutting or ending everything...I just want to stop hurting...No ammount of therapy, or antidepressants can make me stop hurting. I don't know what can though. I can't even really remember a time when I was generally in an up mood rather than generally...Two steps from killing myself. Tomorrow I go to school, I didn't today. Maybe Skye will be back from the crazy house...Maybe I'll be spiteful and evil because she hurt me profoundly.