Quick fix meds, and mom wants me gone.
I'm tired of life, once agian. They're putting me on a different medication now. Celexil this time. Mom told me to graduate highschool early and move out. Those were her exact words. Isn't that great? No one wants me. Not even my own mother wants me. Just the story of my life. God should just strike me dead now. Nobody wants me on this planet...No one loves me here. No one ever will...They can't. ANd here I am too much of a stupid pussy to take my own life. What value does my life have? And who am I to get to live it? What about the millions of people who die every day who want to live life...Contrasted so sharply against me who doesn't? But...If I really didn't want to live life...Wouldn't I stop? Do I secretly want to live life but refuse to reveal the information to anyone...Including myself? If so...Why? Always questions with me...Always questions and never answers. I shouldn't question so much. I shouldn't be such a depressive person. I shouldn't even live. But...I am living. Why? I should be DEAD! I've tried to take my own life so many times!! All laws of physics say I should be long gone!! I took 100 pills of tylonal and chased it with VODKA! I should have died!! I should be dead!!! So why aren't I?
