I cry through my skin.

 Okay, first off...I hate Blogigo 2.0...This is the most annoying thing. It's just like livejournal...Which if I wanted, I'd go rant there. Now, with that out of the way...I guess I'll go on with my entry.

 The school year is rapidly approaching, which breeds a lot of old drama. Mom just doesn't get it...She thinks that because I got a break from the people that if I go back everything is okay. She even said she doesn't think I'm sad anymore, that all my sadness just came from not eating and that I threw my thyroid out of whack. It's not my fucking eating!!!! My eating is because of the people...They'd hate me less if I were thin...Or maybe they'd just notice me less so they wouldn't think to make my life a Hell. No ond really gets that...No one seems to get anything about me and cutting. I don't even get it. I hate that I'm falling back into that. I know it brings nothing good, that in the long run it will just make things wose...But, I don't care. I want to go back to school...I want to prove to everyone that I'm worth something and that I'm not just a dumb dyke who cuts herself and then goes away to die in a corner. But, I know that I can't. If I go back there...I will kill myself. I just can't deal with all those people who constantly hammer me with their insults and their contempt. They know exactly what kills me and how to use it...And I can't handle it. I can't and I won't...No one understands that I don't want to be abused all the time.