Learning a lesson.
So let's teach a depressed girl a lesson. We'll teach it to her by doing exactly what we were doing before...Which obviously led to her poor behaviors.
Mom isn't letting me see Jordan. Pam isn't letting me see Jordan. This is all fucking bullshit!!! If I weren't so fucking unhappy all the time I wouldn't try to fucking forget the world. I wouldn't try to disappear and make myself forget everything. I just want to die. I want to go and kill myself and I actually hope I got an STD so that I CAN die.
Everyone fucking hates me because of this. Everyone. I hate me because of this....And my insides are so torn up right now I can't even cry. I can't...The tears are burning my eyes but none escape. I want to take a fucking razor and paint a permanant smile on. Maybe then they'd fucking understand...Maybe then they'd finally get that I can't fucking deal with this bullshit.
