Fatfatfat
Well...I don't feel dead anymore. I feel very much so alive...And with this life comes all the pain. What's wrong with me? I have such extreme moodswings!! When I looked in the mirror this morning...I thought how thin I looked...Then i looked in it again 20 minutes later and I couldn't believe what an obese monstriousity I am. Two hours later...I'm still stuck on obese monstriousity. Why is food essential? Why does it have the power to make you feel great about yourself...Or terriable? With some people it's the foods they do eat that make them feel good...But with me...It's only when I don't eat that I feel good. I hate the way I look...I just want to cut open my stomache and remove all the disgusting fat from it. I'm fine with everything else...It's just the fat that I have a problem with. lthough...I probably shouldn't talk about performing at home lyposuction. It's not for lack of trying that I'm still fat..I excersize until I fall over exhausted. But, I'm still fat and everyone knows it. Of course they don't CALL me fat(usually) but they use the happyh words for it...Like, voluptious...Curvey...All synamous for FAT. I hate feeling this way...I really do. But...How do I change it? It doesn't help that I know other girls are bigger than me...People tell me that when I complain about my weight. They say, Oh Kat...Don't worry. They're are plenty of girls out there bigger than you!...I don't CARE. Chances are those girls have other things going on for them than their looks. They're probably talented, nice, socialable, lovable...And they probably have people who like them. I am NONE of these! I am nothing good! I can't even say all I have going for me is my looks because I don't HAVE any looks. Everyone tells me how pretty I am...But...It doesn't matter to me unless I believe it.
You\'re absolutely right.
Figure out what you can do about it. What would make you like yourself? [and let\'s say that cutting or killing yourself isnt an option].
You don\'t have to answer me. It\'s totally up to you.
Shel