Mood: Repulsed, fat, ugly.
Listening to: Spongebob!
I don't know which is sadder...People forcing me to eat or the fact that I need to be forced. Maybe I'd eat if food didn't repulse me so much. I find the whole process of eating and just food in general absolutely disgusting. Seriously, think about it, in order to eat whatever you stick in your mouth is encased with salivia and for lack of better words dissolves into your tongue, then you mash it with your teeth and it proceeds down your throat where it is seperated into useable and unuseable...The useable stuff goes to your body and is stored away until needed and the unuseable stuff comes out the other end. And then if you look at your food after you take a bite...It's nausiating. Look really closely at your meat and think about where it came from...Think about everything that is in it. Nerve endings, flesh that was once living and breathing, whatever you're eating's calories. I can't stand eating meat...It makes me want to puke. Bread is alright...But my mum wouldn't let me get away with just eating the bread off a nasty cheeseburger. Nope, I had to eat the cow's nerve endings as well. I'd gotten away without eating for 2 whole days!!! If I had gotten through today to then I would have been content...But nooo...I can't do that because everyone wants me to be a
fat@$$. Well, you know what? The joke is on them...Because now I'm going to go excersize until every last calorie has been burnt away and I'm back where I started because now I'm repulsed with myself and how much I ate. In one day...Normal people eat enough to feed 20 African children for a week...I don't want to go to Africa and eat obese portions of food. I just want to be thin and pretty like everyone else in the world...Maybe if I'm at least normal looking on the outside people will leave me only. Time to go excersize now.
