Cut the Strings
I'm still feeling super angry all the time. I don't feel much like being reflective or any of that special stuff. I feel more like screaming at the top of my lungs and cutting my wrists. I won't though...That would be bad...And I might have a date...I met this guy, his name is Jeff, he's 24 but he seems pretty cool. He asked me out yesterday, but I didn't get his invite until today, he's a sailor, so there are absolutely no strings attatched and I won't have to bother with my defences and walls because there won't be any time for him to reject anything...Definantly a plus. Dad says I should focus on 'Kat stuff' for a while...Honestly? I don't want to. Kat stuff is depression, cutting, hating oneself, writing, and quitting smoking. Kat stuff brings Kat down. Who knows? Maybe Jeff will turn out to be a good thing...Maybe a total shit thing...Either way, it can't effect me that much. He can't break my heart, and I won't get into his, it's really perfect. Although, I'm probably just trying to convince myself of that...I don't really FEEL worried but maybe I secretly am.
