I cry through my skin.

Mood: Depressed

 Have you ever felt so detatched from everything around you that you feel like you're dead? Or that the world you're living in is just a movie and you're a spectator? I feel that way. It's like I'm not even living anymore. I almost wish I weren't. Well...I can't quite say that. It's just that, I'm not sure I want to live but I'm not so sure I don't.  Nobody knows I feel this way...Everyone thinks I'm a happy, bouncy, teenager like I potray. Lately I find myself less and less involved in things that used to make me feel, content if not happy.They just don't make me happy like they used to, I don't know what changed...Me or them but something definantly did. At this  point I just want to curl up in my bed and never get up again. I guess I won't though. Time to take some more painkillers...Shame they only work on physical pain.