Beefy Or Peachy

Dec 12, 2006 at 03:36 o\clock

Making an attempt to mend fences with my family

by: Buttercup2   Category: Family News   Keywords: Healing, fractured, relationships

Well after seeking out help from a variety of sources regarding the fractured relationship with my aunt and sister, I am trying to forgive them for betraying me and give them, and me, another chance. It was suggested to me that many of us have 'horrible thoughts' about others at times but that usually we don't let those thoughts slip. When it happens it usually results in a broken relationship, or even an ending to a relationship. I was pretty much at that place feeling that I could not trust either of them to not hurt or betray me again. My therapist feels it would be too harmful for me to keep a wall up for any extensive period of time without it causing me more internal and or emotional pain of which I can't risk adding any more to my state of being. She further suggests that we often have superficial relationships with some friends and it is also possible to have a similar kind of one with a family member. Know what they are capable of, but also know that they cannot hurt you, or penetrate your soul, as long as you stay true to who you are and that those who know you and love you would never believe some of the outlandish accusations that might be made from some of their own shortcomings.

Based on this information and a few days to sit with it, tonight I made a phone call to my sister. She thanked me for calling her and said I made her day. I guess I will accept that on face value. I told her we couldn't get together at Christmas as hubby doesn't have much time off but that we could arrange to see each other over New Year's as he has 4 days off. That sounded fine to them so we will do our best to make that work.

In the spirit of Christmas, of love and kindness, I invite anyone else who has a similar kind of situation going on in their lives, to join me in an attempt to forgive those who have trespassed us, and to move towards a better relationship for all parties concerned.

Peace and Love to your Hearts,
Aly

Comments for this entry:

  1. quoterainbowslider wrote at Dec 12, 2006 at 04:48 o\clock:ALY I THINK IT IS WONDERFUL YOU TOOK THE FIRST STEP AND HOPE IT ALL COMES TOGETHER SO THAT YOU CAN BE CLOSE TO THEM AGAIN. DON'T FORGET IT IS OK TO PU TUP BOUNDARIES AND HOLD ACCOUNTABLE ALSO.
  2. quoteButtercup2 wrote at Dec 12, 2006 at 07:03 o\clock:My boundaries are in place and I will hold both of them accountable for things said that are just untrue. No more fear. Thanks rainbow :)
  3. quoteSeqkat wrote at Dec 13, 2006 at 15:35 o\clock:Ah ... you're moving to a place of healing. You're extending love even though you feel pain. Love is the way to heal pain.

    Do set your boundaries (as you should with everyone) - that no matter what, you will remain WHO YOU ARE and will not cottle to anyone and give up your values to please them.

    You looked at fear -and when anyone does it loses it's power and can never been seen - it disappears. That's because fear isn't real. As Neale Donald Walsch wrote that God said in his Conversations with God series, (excellent books by the way) that fear is:

    F.alse
    E.vidence
    A.ppearing
    R.eal

    :-)

    I'm happy for you, Aly! God bless you!

    In His Joy,
    Seqkat >^..^<
  4. quoteButtercup2 wrote at Dec 13, 2006 at 21:30 o\clock:It seems I will be doing a lot of reading this New Year, grin. I haven't been reading enough lately and I use to be an avid reader. I think the computer has gotten in the way sometimes, lol.

    I must leave the pain in the past and move forward or I can't have my sister in the present. She knows I am now capable of confronting her behaviors and I would do so again if need be. I hope it won't be necessary. All I have ever wanted is a close and loving relationship with both my sister and my aunt. I thank you for ALL of your support, knowledge and wisdom :). Love, Aly

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